Letters to “Lacey” Part 9

If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” My daughter Emma Katherine Roey lied about a friend being raped and attempting suicide, claimed to have been molested by a priest, and then, just as her attorneys were about to file a law suit, Emma accused her mother (me) of physically abusing her and later of poisoning her with DDT. Emma claimed to have a toxicology report to confirm that her mother (me, again!) poisoned her, but would never turn over this report to my attorney. If you read through the blog, you will find many other examples of Emma’s lying. At one point, she even complained about the way her dad touched her and that he called her a “bitch” and a “slut” everyday. (I refused to listen to her when she talked about her dad like that.) As long as Emma continues with the lies, I will tell her story. Love and thanks to all of you who read and have written to me. If you have any questions or comments, please contact me at: losingemma@gmail.com Please continue to share the blog with others.

Emma on a youth group church trip where they went scuba diving in a pool.  Emma Roey.  Emma Katherine Roey, Emma Kate Roey.

Emma on a youth group church trip where they went scuba diving in a pool. Emma Roey. Emma Katherine Roey, Emma Kate Roey.

Part 9

May 7, 2009
The very next day Emma starts another letter to “Lacey.” This one is 3 pages, single spaced. She starts out saying how she resolves to write more light-hearted thoughts about nothing in particular (to compensate for the depressing letter she mailed out this morning). She says this is the last day she is locked in the back room of the counseling office at Jackson County Comprehensive High School. She says she finished her last final and is bored out of her mind. That along wigh feeling bad for not writing “Lacey” last week (because she went to SEFF) is why she is writing so much this week, so she will share all her random thoughts, stories and other stuff she feels compelled to share with “Lacey.”

Hmmmm. Where should she start? Emma says her mom keeps texting her since shes at the school, and of course she has her phone on vibrate, so she jumps when she is not expecting to get a text. It happened during lunch and everyone was laughing at Emma (not with her) when in the middle of a sentence she went, “Ahhh!” She is lucky the administrators didn’t see her look at her phone. Students aren’t supposed to have them on campus. Emma says she is not technically a student, but they treat her like one because they don’t know any different. She is not sure if these qualify as happy thoughts, but she is trying….

(And no, I did not make it a habit of texting Emma while she was at school. If I were to text her, it usually would have been in response to a text Emma sent me. I did not feel like I should text Emma while she was at school. Also, there was no rule about the kids not having cell phones. They ALL had cell phones. They were not supposed to have them out during class, but there was no rule that they could not have them at school. A slight exaggeration there.)

Emma tells “Lacey” just so she knows, Emma deleted the last letter after she printed it yesterday. That way no one can ever find it and trace it back to Emma. She says she will do the same with this letter. It never hurts to be safe.

(Hmmm. I wonder why Emma felt the need to delete her letters? What did she have to hide? I guess she didn’t expect “Lacey” to turn them over to my attorney.)

Emma’s next paragraph starts off saying that Oh, she can think of something that is not depressing! She got an e-mail that Rob tagged her in a note on Facebook. So, she opened up the note, figuring it would be something worth reading, but it was chain mail. Emma says she loves her friends, but does not understand them.

Emma says she just texted Jordan and asked what was a funny youth group story, trying to think of something to tell “Lacey” and Jordan texted back “idk…….monopolyzng? :P” Emma says to remember that Jordan can’t or won’t spell… and anything that she says includes “idk” whether she really knows or not). Emma says she THINKS she knows what Jordan means by that, and it’s a story she doesn’t think she’s told “Lacey.” The kids were at youth grou one night, talking about “norms” which basically meant Ms. F. was talking about how to run the group and a few of them were half paying attention while the rest were off in na-na land (teenagers do not listen well at 7:30 on a Sunday night). Ms. F. was talking about how everyone needs to feel comfortable sharing their ideas, and this won’t happen if one person keeps talking. To back up her point, she told us about an instance in the book club where one adult participant (whom she did not name) was monopolizing the conversation and because of that, other people were too intimidated to contribute. Then she asked the kids to share their experiences with this problem and Evan, who was still processing the book club example raised his and and said, “But Father T. is the priest…..isn’t he supposed to monopolize the converstation?” Everybody, Even Ms. F. started laughing.
Emma goes on to say that most of them knew that adult she was referring to was Mrs. L, who’s family Emma wrote about earlier, and everyone knew it was not Father T.
(Ok, the only problem here is that Ms. L. never attended bookclub. I attended book club, and Emma often went with me, but never went without me. Mrs. L. never participated in the book club Just an opportunity for Emma to speak ill of someone she didn’t like. It did not matter if it were true or not.)

Emma goes on to say that Jordan is sort of upset with her bacuse she asked Emma what she would say if she were to speak at Jordan’s funeral. Emma gets more verbose telling the story, but basically says she would want to tell a story that people would remember Jordan by, so she would tell about when they were at camp and Jordan was performaning her color guard routine with the mop.
“What?? That’s what you want people to remember me by?? Why?? That’s mean!!”
Emma says that the problem was that Jordan knew exactly what she wanted Emma to say before they started talking, but unfortunately, Emma didn’t, so now Jordan is mad at her for saying the wrong thing at her imaginary funeral. And how does Emma end up with friends she can’t understand?

Emma’s next paragraph starts out with, “Guess what?” Emma says she still has an hour and fifty-seven minutes to talk to “Lacey” and isn’t “Lacey” thrilled. She also changed to a smaller font so she won’t have to print out as many pages. Let her see, what life changing venture can Emma tell “Lacey” about now? Oooo, she got a camera. It’s a Kodak and it’s dark purple. It stores almost 2000 pictures. Now she can take pictures of her friends and be assured she is not in them. Of course, she will have to be careful not to let it out of her hands… She is sure her friends would be absolutely delighted to torture her with her own camera. They have enough fun pulling out cameras or phones and pointing them at her. Oh, and there’s a really funny video Jordan has of Confirmation last summer. When you hit play, everything is blurry and then it focuses on the group and they all make funny faces. Then you her Jordan say, “I’m taking a video…” and everyone drops their poses and grumbles. Lol.

Then Emma says oh wow, Jordan just texted her. All it says is, “c pretty butum.” And Emma actually does not see the pretty button because apparently Jordan forgot the picture she ment to attach. Or knowing Jordan, she may have even forgotten to attach the pretty button video she thought to take for Emma’s viewing pleasure.

What other useless material does Emma feel like sharing. She may tell Jordan about the time the pool collapsed….then Jordan texts again with a video attachment that is labeled “pretty butun” and the video is 23 seconds long, but it’s very dark, so it is hard to tell if it is a button on Jordan’s knee under her desk. Emma says she can hear Jordan’s Geometry teacher in the background saying, “And with the second prep, I want you to do for homework…I will take this up” and the video cuts off.
Next Emma goes on to tell the pool story about how she and Kayla Benifield Weaver collapsed our inflatable pool, but they were fine and came out miraculously unscathed except for Kayla hitting her head on a tree.
(Another Brian Wiilliams/Emma Roey moment here, as I was there when the pool collapsed, and no, Kayla did not hit her head on a tree. I wonder if Emma had to duck from sniper fire as well?)

Emma writes a little more fluff, killing time about looking out the window and all the things she sees in the parking lot, how she has an hour and 15 minutes left, complains about the 2 hours she spends on the school bus, talks about an upcoming church youth group trip… Emma complains about needing a bathing suit, but the only thing she can find in her size is a bikini, and she would like to order a tankini, but they are so expensive.…. and then signs off with the usual:
Blessings and Love, Emma-Kate


(One last note about the bikini. I don’t know why Emma felt the need to say the only thing she could find in her size was a bikini. At that point, we were busy finishing up with school and did not go shopping for a bathing suit until probably sometime in June. In fact, I had ordered Emma a tankini from Land’s End, but after she got it, she decided she didn’t like it and refused to wear it. If only she’d told me that before she wore it so I could have returned it. I don’t understand this need to say the only thing she could find was a bikini. Emma never would wear a bikini, and we did find a lovely black and white suite at Kohls’s that met with her approval. See Pic……….. )

Letters to “Lacey” – Preface (UPDATED 01/06/20115)

If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” My daughter Emma Katherine Roey lied about a friend being raped and attempting suicide, claimed to have been molested by a priest, and then, just as her attorneys were about to file a law suit, Emma accused her mother of physically abusing her and poisoning her with DDT. Emma claimed to have a toxicology report to confirm that her mother poisoned her, but would never turn over this report to my attorney. Emma still claims to have health problems because of this “poisoning.” As long as Emma continues with the lies, I will tell her story. Love and thanks to all of you who read and have written to me, Emma’s mom. If you have any questions or comments, please contact me at: losingemma@gmail.com
Thank you to my readers for your support and please continue to share the blog with others.


Letters to Lacey –Preface (How Emma ended up in on-line school, and connecting with the penpal she claimed was raped and attempted suicide.)

When we homeschooled, Emma won a local spelling bee and then lost out in the next level, but I think she had fun anyway, especially because she beat out a couple of boys that were older than she was!

When we homeschooled, Emma won a local spelling bee and then lost out in the next level, but I think she had fun anyway, especially because she beat out a couple of boys that were older than she was!

After five years of homeschooling, we decided to quit and put Emma in public school. I’m still a huge fan of homeschooling, but for Emma, it was probably a mistake. At first, I thought we did everything pretty well. In addition to school, Emma was involved in many, many activities. I wanted to make sure that Emma was well “socialized.” Over the years while homeschooling, Emma was involved in an arts program and took other homeschool group classes, she was on a kayaking team, in a homeschool chorus, church choir, church newsletter team, Sunday School, piano lessons, softball, a knitting group, a neighborhood bible study, a church book club, was a church acolyte, sang with the Gwinnett Young Singers under Lynn Urda and got to sing with the Atlanta Symphony Orchestra, and we also went on homeschool field trips to places like the UGA Vet school, WSB TV/Radio in Atlanta, Coca Cola, the William Harris Homestead, the Capital, etc.

A field trip to Atlanta with some homeschool friends.  To Emma's left is Johnathan McCravy, and the other redhead is Derek McCravy, the sons of my good friend Sandi McCravy (Sandra Brooks McCravy)

A field trip to Atlanta with some homeschool friends. To Emma’s left is Johnathan McCravy, and the other redhead is Derek McCravy, the sons of my good friend Sandi McCravy (Sandra Brooks McCravy)

Homeschooling started out great. Emma and I both enjoyed it. Seeing your child get excited about learning is an amazing experience. If Emma wanted to spend extra time on a subject, it was no problem. As a parent, I saw how so many things could turn into a learning opportunity. We would be out in public somewhere and see something that brought to mind something we learned in school. Or we would hear of something and want to know more about it, so Emma would do some research. For example, one birthday or Christmas, my sister sent Emma a prayer box necklace, and we were curious, so Emma looked up the history of prayer boxes and shared with me what she found. Thank goodness for Google!

Emma Katherine Roey, Derek McCravy, and Johnathan McCravy on a field trip to the Governor's Mansion in Atlanta.

Emma Katherine Roey, Derek McCravy, and Johnathan McCravy on a field trip to the Governor’s Mansion in Atlanta.

I probably should have stopped homeschooling in middle school, as after 2 or three years, it got more and more difficult. If I left the room, Emma kept books hidden in the school room, so she would pull out a book and read instead of doing her school work. We could have easily been done with school by 2pm every day, but Emma started dragging things out to 5pm, and sometimes later. I didn’t like doing school in the afternoon because I was always very tired in the afternoons and felt better in the mornings. I didn’t know at the time what was wrong, but I later found I had a medical condition causing the fatigue. School was Monday through Fridays, but sometimes Emma would drag her feet so much that we would have to do school on Saturdays. Part of the problem may have been that I had a child with a higher IQ than I have (I don’t know for sure about my IQ, but I’m guessing it is not as high as Emma’s!) and that Emma had no respect for Phill and I as authority figures. That may have been our mistake. We were a tight little family and we did everything together. Phill and I probably shouldn’t have included Emma in on so much, but we often treated her more as an equal in the family rather than the child. Because we both adored our daughter, her wishes often overrode our own, so yes, she was spoiled, but I reasoned that all kids seem to be spoiled nowadays.

Emma, showing her silly side after decorating an Easter Egg from a kit my sister sent one Easter.  Emma Roey, Emma Katherine Roey, Emma Kate Roey

Emma, showing her silly side after decorating an Easter Egg from a kit my sister sent one Easter. Emma Roey, Emma Katherine Roey, Emma Kate Roey

In addition to reading when she should have been doing her school work, Emma did things like lying and cheating. If Emma needed to re-do some math problems, I would write the pages and the problem numbers on the board, and we would recheck them later. Emma started erasing the board, hoping I would forget about the work she needed to re-do.

I had to hide my teacher’s manual, so that Emma couldn’t cheat. One time, she hid one of my books, and I’m not sure as to the reasoning behind that. I guess she was trying to get out of math class that day.

I think I’ve mentioned Emma’s affinity for sweets, and how we would have to lock up things like chocolate chips, marshmallows, etc. or Emma would steal them. I would be all set to bake and not have what I needed because Emma had eaten them all. We also had to lock up the Halloween candy, and even with that, Emma discovered where the key was and I found dozens of candy wrappers in her room. One year, at the end of the school year, I was cleaning up our school room and found dozens of candy wrappers hidden out there between books, under things, and crammed in anywhere Emma could hide them that I might not look. She had a lot of arts and crafts that she used both for fun and for school, and these were things that I didn’t bother with much, so she knew where to hide things so I wouldn’t see them. It seemed funny to me that she was too lazy to bother to throw all the wrappers away. She could have easily hidden them in a piece of paper and thrown it in the garbage a few at a time, or even shoved them deep, down in the trash while I wasn’t looking or when I was outside or not home.

Emma’s attitude also soured, and after hearing a clip on the radio about a news anchor whose mic was on when she was talking about her sister-in-law, calling her a “control-freak” and “micromanaging,” those became Emma’s two favorite phrases to describe her mother. She called me these things over and over again. Emma decided it was time to challenge my authority as her teacher, and all of a sudden, I was the idiot who knew nothing, and she was the teen who knew it all. She seemed to think my whole goal in homeschooling was to make her life miserable.

Because I couldn’t trust Emma to get her work done, I ended up being her babysitter or maybe “warden” is a better word. I couldn’t leave the school room to do other things because Emma would stop doing her work. Homeschooling took a lot of time, for me as a parent, but then it became endless. It was sad to me because I knew so many kids at the arts program who were homeschooling and did not have the attitude that Emma had. I didn’t know what I was doing wrong. I enjoyed homeschooling with Emma the first few years. I think I learned as much as she did, but when she was supposed to becoming more mature and independent and able to do her assignments on her own, without me there at every step, Emma just didn’t do it. Maybe it was her way of rebelling, I don’t know. I just knew homeschooling wasn’t working anymore, and it was time to quit. I felt like a homeschool failure, but I knew I had seen many kids in the arts program quit to attend public school. Some parents worried they couldn’t deal with the difficult subjects like biology and algebra. Other parents, like me, couldn’t deal with the nasty teenage attitude.

Jackson County Comprehensive High School

High School seemed like a good time for a fresh start, and we enrolled Emma in Jackson County Comprehensive High School in Jefferson Ga. I remember, later on, a friend who knew Emma personally commenting to me that Emma seemed to have a fascination or obsession with sex. Emma was always commenting on the kids at school being sexually active. Sometime the summer before Emma started her freshman year at JCCHS, we’d seen an article in the local paper about the number of kids in Jackson county who were sexually active. It seems like I remember reading that 70% of the kids in high school had had sex. Once Emma saw that, it must have stuck with her and to her, everyone (except Emma, who would later buy herself a purity ring) she knew was having sex. Emma talked about the kids at school having sex a LOT. If it wasn’t sex, it was about someone being pregnant or thinking they might be pregnant.

Before school started, Emma, along with all the other freshmen, had to ride the bus to school and find their classes in an effort to make their first day easier. If you’ve read my earlier posts, Emma claimed that on the bus she sat next to a girl who was a freshman for the 2nd time and who had a 4 year old. This turned out not to be true. Emma also claimed that there were about 10 pregnant freshman girls, but later when I checked with our neighbor who was a P.E. teacher at the school, Coach Cora Andrews (Dr. Cora Andrews), she told me there were only two pregnancies that year at the school.

About the first month or two, Emma LOVED school. She loved riding the bus with three girls in our neighborhood who were all sophomores and one neighbor who lived in Quail Crossing, a subdivision close to our Deer Creek Subdivision, who was also a freshman. I remember Emma coming home after a week or so of school and defiantly telling me, “You could never make me homeschool again!”

After a couple of months, Emma’s tone changed and she wanted to go back to homeschooling. She hated school and had nothing nice to say about the girls on the bus that she started out calling her “friends.” All of a sudden, the stories changed and these 4 girls were all having sex, drinking, doing drugs, stealing alcohol from their parents, etc. Emma no longer called them friends, but referred to them as acquaintances. She made up stories about one the brother of one of the girls who lived on our street, claiming that he had been arrested for pot possession for the second time, but the parents didn’t know. She complained about how much time was wasted in class, and how much time was wasted riding the bus. One day, she gave me a blow by blow account of her day to tell me how little work she actually did. One day Emma got very angry with me for not pulling her out of Jackson County Comprehensive High School. I will never forget her screaming at me how it was my fault because I “gave up on her.”

Besides the “acquaintances” Emma rode the bus with, she had nothing nice to say about anyone on the bus. She claimed that kids smoked on the bus and the bus driver didn’t notice. She claimed that drugs were sold on the bus. If you’ve read my earlier posts, you’ll remember that Emma claimed she was drug searched when a neighbor boy turned in her name along with her “acquaintances” because he had a grudge against one of the girls. (This story turned out not to be true, and I confirmed it with one of the school administrators, Kendra Phillips, who told me that if Emma had been drug searched, Ms. Phillips would have been present for it. I also checked with some of the girls Emma rode the bus with, and they never saw anyone selling drugs on the bus.) After reading a Reader’s Digest article on teenagers having drug parties, where they took medication from their parent’s medicine cabinets and threw everything into a bowl and then took handfuls of pills, Emma claimed that these parties went on at Jackson County Comprehensive High School, and she mentioned one of the girls, in particular, as a participant in these parties. (This is the same young lady Emma made up the story of having an abortion that fall, and then at the end of the year claimed she thought she was pregnant again.) Also, one day we saw a news clip about a boy in another part of the country who wanted to dress as a girl, do his hair, wear makeup, etc. Shortly after that, Emma claimed there were boys at school who dressed as girls, wore makeup and pantyhose, etc. I remember I just sort of blew this off thinking Emma didn’t have her facts straight. JCCHS had a fairly strict dress code, so I couldn’t imagine this going on, but Emma insisted. It wasn’t something I cared enough about to investigate, so I never did.

From what I could tell, Emma’s “acquaintances” still thought of her as a friend. They tried to invite Emma to do things with them, but Emma frequently refused. She didn’t want to associate with these girls. I didn’t think about it until later when a friend pointed out to me that Emma seemed to always think of herself as superior to everyone else. All the kids at school were drug users, having sex, having abortions, drinking, etc., but my daughter was the “good girl.” She complained that her “aquaintances” made fun of her for attending church, being involved in the youth group, being a goody two-shoes, being smart, etc. She also claimed they made fun of her for being smart, the way she talked, the way she dressed, said she had a big nose etc., etc., etc. If most of us look back to high school, we can remember some teasing, and maybe even some bullying, but these girls tried to befriend Emma, and I have to wonder if any or all of Emma’s accusations were true. I can imagine some teasing going on, but the girl Emma claimed to have had an abortion and then possibly a 2nd pregnancy (in addition to taking drugs and drinking), was nothing but kind to Emma when Emma started public school. She was very helpful in explaining what to expect, what she would need, telling her about classes, teachers, etc.

Emm's old lady shirt.  Emma Roey, Emma Kate Roey, Emma Katherine Roey

Emm’s old lady shirt. Emma Roey, Emma Kate Roey, Emma Katherine Roey

One particular complaint I remember was about a shirt Emma wore. (See picture.) Phill had picked up this shirt at Sam’s or Costco, thinking Emma would like it. I don’t remember if we just gave it to her or saved it for her birthday, but in any event, it was very similar to what we saw lots of teen girls wearing, and it looked cute on her.

One day, Emma came home complaining that her “acquaintances” had made fun of her wearing this shirt. I asked how that could be as it looked pretty much like what all the other girls wore. Emma said that they told her that hers looked like an old lady shirt. Ok, dear readers. If you are familiar with this style, would someone please explain to me how Emma’s shirt looks any different from the dozens and dozens of this style that I have seen on teen girls?

I had tried to encourage Emma to get involved in school activities, and offered to take her to music lessons if she wanted to join the band. Since Emma played the piano, I knew she could easily learn another instrument and get into the band since I had learned a 2nd instrument in high school so that I could play in the jazz band. At least one, and maybe two of Emma’s “acquaintances” on the bus were in the band, and one of the girls had told me about the band trips. Remembering my own band trips, I thought this was something Emma would enjoy, but she claimed that the band trips were known for drinking, drugs, and kids having sex on the bus. She was definitely not interested.

The Drama Department at JCCHS

Emma got the lead in the play Metamorphosis by Mary Zimmernan under her Drama teacher, Bonnie Roberts.  Jackson County Comprehensive High School.

Emma got the lead in the play Metamorphosis by Mary Zimmernan under her Drama teacher, Bonnie Roberts. Jackson County Comprehensive High School.

Emma did get into Drama I, and she loved it. She hated the kids who were just in there because they had to take an elective and were not serious about Drama. Emma tried out for the play Metamorphosis by Mary Zimmerman and got the lead. I remember meeting her teacher, Bonnie Roberts, and Mrs. Roberts told me about Emma walking into the audition and when she spoke, “Meryl Streep’s voice came out!” Emma has a great voice that projects well.

Emma was in her element once she found Drama. She absolutely loved it and loved Mrs. Roberts. Like everything else, Emma began telling stories about the Drama group. I don’t even remember all the stories now, but one was that all the girls who worked on the crew were lesbians. I didn’t really buy it, and I wondered if Emma came up with this story from listening to Neal Boortz. (Phill and I were huge Neal Boortz fans, so our radio was always on whether at home or in the car, and Emma grew up listening to his program. In retrospect, I wonder if Emma lacked the maturity for this kind of program.) Several times on his program, we’d heard Neal talk about Lugs (Lesbians Until Graduation), girls who were experimenting with their sexuality or who just took on the roll of being a lesbian because they didn’t find anyone at their high school they wanted to date. According to Emma, ALL the girls on the drama crew were lesbians and I remember her talking about two off them being a couple. Whether or not this is true, who knows? It wasn’t something I cared about one way or the other.

An Early Accusation of Sexual Assault

One evening, when I picked Emma up after rehearsal, she was very upset. She claimed that she went backstage for something, and that the male lead, a young man named Johnny Boddie, a boy Emma described as very arrogant, had tried to kiss her. Emma told me she slapped him and ran away, and then she begged me not to tell Phill about the attempted kiss. At first I questioned Emma about the story. What was she doing when she went back stage? What was Johnny doing? What did they talk about? Why did she think he was trying to kiss her? Was he just reaching for something that happened to be in her proximity? Later on I wondered if this Emma’s first attempt at claiming sexual assault? This would have been about a year and half before Emma alleged to have been sexually assaulted by the priest. Was this a practice run or her dress rehearsal for the next big show? Later, when I go through Emma’s e-mails, you will see how she describes the story in a much more sinister fashion to her pen-pal, “Lacey.”

Emma was adamant that Johnny had tried to kiss her, although she never really gave me in details of how the event occurred. If that were the case, I told Emma that I thought she handled it just fine, but of course, I didn’t keep too many secrets from Phill, so I told him the story. A couple of weeks later, we were leaving church, and I don’t remember what we were talking about, but Phill brought up the story of Emma slapping Johnny Boddie, and Emma was FURIOUS with me for telling her dad. When I contacted Johnny Boddie and asked him if I could ask him a few questions about his time with Emma at JCCHS, he stated that his communications with Emma were minimal and that they had worked on one play together. He stated he had no recollection whatsoever of any conversations over topics other than the play or school work, so I never really got to ask him if he had attempted to kiss Emma. He ended his e-mail with a comment about how I should respect my daughter’s privacy or some such thing. One of Emma’s former friends told me that while Johnny was pompous, he was not aggressive. I have to admit, from his e-mail, he sounded pretty much just as Emma and her friends described him. I’m sure if he’d been disciplined for attempting to sexually assault another student, he might have felt a little differently about Emma’ right to privacy.

Emma told other interesting stories about Johnny Boddie, who was a junior when Emma was a freshman. Emma claimed that Johnny was engaged, which I thought sounded a little bizarre for a 16 year old in this day and time, and I did question her about it, but there again, I wasn’t going to go up to this 11th grade kid and ask him about the engagement. Then, that fall, not too long into the school year, Emma said that Johnny’s fiancé had moved away, and although he was a notorious flirt and cheated on his fiancé, he was still engaged. Again, I was not interested enough to investigate this story.

When the play Metamorphosis by Mary Zimmerman was put on at JCCHS, there was a scene where Johnny was shirtless, and it looked like he was pigeon chested. I don’t know if Emma had never heard of or seen this type of deformity before, but after the play, she brought it up and told me that the reason Johnny’s chest sank it was because he had been run over by a car when he was a child. Ummm, ok. I didn’t quite believe it, but I didn’t exactly give the kid a medical examination to check, so I let that one go.

Lies about Losing the Drama Competition

Jackson County Comprehensive High School's Drama Department put on the play Metamorphosis by Mary Zimmerman Emma's freshman year.

Jackson County Comprehensive High School’s Drama Department put on the play Metamorphosis by Mary Zimmerman Emma’s freshman year.

The drama department performed Metamorphosis for a district competition, and if they had won, they would have gone on to state. First, the play was put on at the high school during school, and then two nights for the parents. Sadly, the attendance was pretty poor, but Mrs. Roberts and the drama department did a wonderful job. Phill was working on the nights the play was put on, so he went to the dress rehearsals and video recorded the play for Mrs. Roberts and made copies. (Maybe one day he will give me a copy.) By recording the production for Mrs. Roberts, Phill was able to see the play, and I went to both shows.

Mrs. Roberts had a photographer taking photos of the cast, and the parents could buy a disc of the photos, so of course I did. I remember asking the photographer about the photos and she asked who my child was. At that time, Emma was going by Emma Kate Roey, instead of her usual Emma, so I told the photographer, and she said, “Oh! She’s the lead!” I remember being surprised because I really didn’t know anything about the play and while it sounded like Emma had a big part in it, I certainly didn’t know she was the lead. She did a wonderful job though, and I was very proud of her.

I don’t remember where the competition was, but I had to have Emma at the school early one Saturday to board the bus with the other drama kids to go to their competition. I was nervous and excited for her, and knew Emma would have a great time.

That evening, when I picked Emma up, she was not happy. Her group had not done well. Emma told me that another school had tampered with their sound equipment and ended up messing up the whole show. I really didn’t quite understand what she was saying, but according to Emma, another school had messed up their performance and they didn’t get a chance to do it over, etc., etc. I know these things have rules, and I wasn’t there, but the long and short of it was that they lost the competition. It really wasn’t until a few months ago that I contacted Bonnie Roberts to ask her about this story. Surprise, surprise! There was no tampering or vandalism as Emma claimed. Mrs. Roberts told me that her disc was not formatted properly for the equipment that they had to use at the competition. It was pretty simple really, but I guess Emma needed someone to blame for losing, so she made up another story.

Emma Complains of Racial Favoritism at JCCHS

Phill used to joke that Emma was a little racist. Emma could be very judgmental about other cultures. Emma frequently complained about reverse discrimination at her school. She thought the school showed favoritism to the black students and that the black students got away with stuff that the white students would not get away with. It’s been a few years, and her complaints were so petty, that I don’t even remember what they were. I’m not sure where this attitude came from unless it was just from our quiet life and Emma growing up in Jackson County, Ga. Phill grew up in Brick Town New Jersey, around different cultures, and I grew up overseas as well as in the U.S., moving every 2-3 years, so we both had been around a lot of different kinds of people.

One day, Emma complained about another 9th grader, a black young man, who was in Emma’s drama class. Emma told me that this young man accused her of being a racist. I have no idea what led up to the accusation, but Emma complained about this boy several times over the course of the semester. She made it very clear she did not like him at all. I remember her telling me this particular story of him saying to her, “You don’t like black people.”
She told me that she replied, “I don’t like SOME black people. I don’t like SOME white people.”
She also told me that she said, “I prefer to judge people on the content of their character rather than the color of their skin.” And then she exclaimed, “Mom! He didn’t even get that I was quoting Martin Luther King!”

Truth or Fiction? I’ll let my readers guess for themselves if this story even occurred or was it another one of Emma’s dramatizations.

ROTC

Private Emma had nothing nice to say about ROTC at Jackson County Comprehensive High School.

Private Emma had nothing nice to say about ROTC at Jackson County Comprehensive High School.

Before school started, Emma had to pick her electives. In addition to Drama, she had to pick another elective. I was very surprised when she chose ROTC. My daughter? Emma was not the military type. When she explained her choice to me, she told me that the period she had open for an elective her only choices were Drama or ROTC, and she said, “And Mom, I suck at dance!” Emma didn’t have a lot of experience with dance, but I thought she could have taken it and learned something, but Emma was the type, if she wasn’t good at something, she didn’t want to do it. It didn’t matter to me, and ROTC sounded pretty neat, so I hoped she would like it, but she didn’t.

ROTC brought pretty much the same complaints as Emma had about the rest of school. Sex, drugs, drinking… Emma claimed her platoon leader was mean. (This was the young man that she said accused her and her friends of having drugs on the bus, causing them to be drug searched.) Emma claimed that one of the ROTC girls in her class had a baby, and I found out later from another girl who was in ROTC with Emma that no one had a baby in ROTC that year. This classmate also told me that if you had a baby, you were out of ROTC and couldn’t rejoin.

While in ROTC, Emma told a great story (mentioned earlier) about a girl named Kristin who lived next door to us with her mother and stepfather, and how Kristin would get so nervous when she had to do presentation that she ran to the bathroom to throw up. The ROTC instructor sent Emma to check on Kristin, and Emma told me how funny it was and reenacted the tale of Kristin with her head over the toilet, laughing and saying that she didn’t know why she got so nervous and then would throw up again. Great story, but one of Emma’s ROTC classmates told me that it was just that, a story. This young lady told me that Kristin was a good speaker and later became a platoon leader.

Emma’s second semester, she had to take P.E. and Health, so she didn’t get to take Drama that semester. She was very unhappy at school, and never made any friends in 9th grade. She never invited anyone over, and the only time she was invited to someone’s home was along with some other girls to work on an English project. If you’ve read my earlier posts, that was the night she also went with this classmate to the church youth group at Walnut Fork Baptist Church, Hoschton. I won’t repeat the story again here, but Emma lied about her classmate, her classmate’s family, what went on at the youth group, etc.

One of Emma’s classmates told me, “Honestly I think Emma just really wanted attention and she wasn’t getting it from anybody but you. Any attention is better than no attention for her whether it be good or bad. She got absolutely no attention at all at school. People didn’t really get along with her there.”

Emma told me she couldn’t try out for the play that 2nd semester because it was only for the kids in the drama class, so she was disappointed about that since it was the only class she liked. Emma became more and more miserable and started throwing up more and more. She missed so much school that we had to pull her out and she finished 9th grade on line. It in her on-line English class where Emma was paired up with a young lady whom I will call “Lacey” who was another 9th grader from a different part of the state.

As I understood it, Emma had an English project where each child was assigned a pen-pal, and “Lacey” was Emma’s. They were supposed to write letters, but other than that I don’t remember how it worked. They may have had to copy their letters and turn them in to the English instructor. Emma got really into the letters and complained that “Lacey” did not write as often as she was supposed to.

Emma seemed to really enjoy the pen-pal relationship, and when the class was over, the two girls continued to e-mail and text each other. Emma began making up stories about “Lacey” and her family. Some of these stories were as follows:

Emma claimed “Lacey” had been molested as a child and volunteered with her church helping other kids who’d been molested. (Lie)

Emma claimed that “Lacey’s” mother had breast cancer (true) and was hospitalized and nearly died two or three times. (“Lacey’s” mother did have breast cancer, but was treated as an outpatient and never required hospitalization.)

The reason “Lacey” had to go to public school in 10th grade was because her mother was too sick from cancer to homeschool her anymore. (Lie. See above.)

When “Lacey” was in 10th grade, Emma claimed “Lacey’s” periods were so bad that she frequently had to leave school. (I never verified this one, but would be willing to bet it’s not true.)

And then, a few months after starting the pen-pal relationship, on Dec. 19, 2009, Emma’s birthday, Emma went to her church youth group, and when Phill and I picked her up, she claimed that she had received a call from “Lacey” who was at the ER near her NW Georgia home, after she’d been raped in her home during a Christmas get-together. For Emma’s 16th birthday, we’d planned on going out to eat, but because Phill was sick, he asked her if we could postpone. Emma was all involved in her youth group, but didn’t really have any friends to invite to a party, so it was a pretty low key birthday, and later Emma would complain to Suzie McGarvey, (North Georgia Counseling Associates, Formerly of Lanier Counseling) that her birthday wasn’t special enough. This was also the birthday where I’d taken Emma shopping several times and spent well over $400 (I want to say $460, but I can’t remember the exact total at the moment.) on her, a good bit more than we usually spent for a birthday or Christmas.

I keep thinking back to the comment made by one of Emma’s classmates, how she didn’t get any attention at school. Was the rape story because Emma did not get enough attention on her 16h birthday?

In any event, I will share with you some of the e-mails that Emma wrote to “Lacey.”

Mother’s Day 2014

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“Blaming Mother is just a negative way of clinging to her still.” Author Unknown.

Happy Mother’s Day to my readers and to my darling Emma who made me a mom!  I really wanted to spend some time sharing some thoughts today, but have not been home long enough to do this, so I guess it will have to wait for another post.  In any event, I was thinking of Emma all day.  Even with the horrible things she’s done, I still have hope for my baby girl.  I had so many fun times as Emma’s mom.  The early years were simply amazing, seeing this baby grow into a toddler, then a little girl, then a tween, and a teen.  So many times I thought, “This is all I ever wanted, to be Emma’s mom.”  People have asked me if I had the chance to do it over, would I have still had a child? I can’t answer this, and I don’t live in the land of woulda, shoulda, coulda. What’s done is done. I love Emma, and I worry for Emma. I fear that she will continue to ruin her life and hurt those around her, but what Emma does is out of my control  Through all this, I’ve gone on with my life, and through all this, I still find life pretty amazing. That doesn’t mean I don’t have some bad days. When you’ve been through such a horrible experience like this, you are never the same, and it never goes away. You can curl up and die or go on to make the best life you can. I’m still working on it, but I have chosen the latter.

I will get back to writing about Emma and therapy when I have a little more time.

Emma’s Descent into Therapy Part 2, Preface to Manna Treatment (Continued)

If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” Both of these posts give a brief description of what happened. Emma is a young woman who made up a story about a story about a cyber friend being raped and claimed it brought up her own “repressed memories” of a priest of molesting her. As her attorney was about to file a lawsuit against the priest and the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse to stop the suit because she knew her lies were about to be discovered. I am that mother. Emma claims to have toxicology reports showing that I poisoned her with DDT, essentially accusing me of ATTEMPTED MURDER, but refuses to turn over these reports to my attorney. She also claims that while living with her boyfriend’s family in Ohio, her boyfriend’s mother was afraid I would show up and kill her entire family. When I contacted the boyfriend’s mother, she told me that this was “ridiculous.” Emma’s boyfriend/fiance eventually broke up with her when he had his own doubts about Emma.
As always, if you have any questions or comments, contact me at: losingemma@gmail.com

Manna Treatment and Counseling and Dr. Genie Burnett

Emma, Nathan, Johnathan McCravy, and Derek McCravy on a homeschool fieldtrip to the William Harris Homestead.

Emma, Nathan, Johnathan McCravy, and Derek McCravy on a homeschool fieldtrip to the William Harris Homestead.

I’ll be the first to admit I had no clue in how to go about choosing a therapist. After claiming to be sexually abused by a priest at our church, I felt like Emma needed to talk to a “professional” who could help her deal with what happened. Earlier, I mentioned that when Emma went to speak to a therapist at the Tree House in Winder, Ga, Emma was uncooperative. Phill and I gave Emma a break for about a month, and then decided she would see a therapist after we returned from visiting family in early July.

The Deacon at our church, who had been instrumental in helping us file a complaint against the priest Emma accused, recommended a therapist, and my friend Sandi McCravy (Sandra Brooks McCravy) recommended her therapist, Dr. Genie Burnett. All I knew about Dr. Burnett was that Sandi had seen her off and on for about 11 years at that point. Sandi had had an eating disorder and had abused laxatives many years before. She told me that Dr. Genie Burnett primarily treated eating disorders but because a lot of eating disorders stemmed from sexual abuse, Dr. Burnett had a lot of experience with girls like Emma. Sandi had gone to private sessions with Dr. Burnett as well as group therapy along with other women. Sandi frequently confided in me about her sessions with Dr. Genie Burnett and told me what she talked to her about. I remember a lot of it was issues with her family, primarily her mother, but also Sandi had issues with her brother and his wife who were more affluent than Sandi and Greg, and issues with her sister, the former beauty queen.

Dr. Burnett also treated Sandi’s son, Derek who suffered with Asperger’s, a mild form of Autisim. At one point, Sandi told me that Dr. Burnett was the one who had diagnosed Derek when he was about 8 years old, but some time before that, Sandi had been in denial about Derek’s problems and had told me all his problems were related to food allergies. She went to see various people about alternative medicine therapies and frequently had Derek on some kind of supplement that was supposed to keep him in check. She claimed that he couldn’t eat gluten or dairy, but if he wanted pizza she could just give him some supplements and he could eat what he wanted. Sandi frequently tried things that I thought were a little odd to me. One time, Sandi bought some sort of foot soak that was supposed to pull toxins out of your body if you just soaked your feet in it. I thought it sounded ridiculous, but Sandi claimed that her godmother, Wren, who had been battling cancer, used one of these things and had recommended it. I remember her telling me it cost something ridiculous, like $600, but Sandi got a deal on hers. I thought the whole thing was bizarre and a waste of money, but people will do what they will do.

Sandi raved about Dr. Genie Burnett when she was telling me how Dr. Burnett was the one to diagnose Derek, but on a previous occasion, Sandi had confided in me that when the boys were little and she was on government assistance, one of the doctors who saw the kids tried to tell her that Derek had autism, but she wouldn’t accept it. I don’t remember what government program the boys were on. Since we live in Georgia, it may have been PeachCare, but Sandi took the boys out of the program because she didn’t want that diagnosis on Derek’s record. She stayed in denial about his problems for many years, and I remember once when a woman named Ruth, who we worked with us gave, Sandi’s name and phone number to a lady who had a child with autism, and the woman called Sandi, Sandi was furious. She called me up, ranting and raving that Ruth had no right to give her phone number to this woman because Derek did not have autisim!

There were so many inconsistencies in what Sandi told me about Derek and autism, but I never questioned her. Sandi was always super sensitive on the issue, and knowing how we mamas are fiercely protective of our kids, I just let it go.

Derek’s senior year of high school, Sandi began falling apart, calling me frequently, crying, sometimes hysterically, over the thought of Derek going off to college. Derek is a very bright young man and received a scholarship to Mercer University in Macon, Ga. I frequently had to “talk Sandi down” as Phill liked to phrase it, and I reassured her that he would be fine, and that Macon was not that far away, and if she wanted, I would drive down there with her to see him.

Derek, on the other hand, seemed just fine about the thought of going off to college, but Sandi thought he needed to see Dr. Genie Burnett at Manna Treatment on a regular basis before he went off to live in the dorm. Because of Derek’s diagnosis, he was able to get a private room in the dorm, and he went off to college happy and excited about his new adventure. In the typical teenage fashion, Sandi complained that he did not call home enough.

Probably the deciding factor in choosing a counselor was that Dr. Genie Burnett was a Christian counselor, and Emma, being a conservative Christian, wanted to go to a Christian counselor. I didn’t really care who Emma went to as long as it was someone she felt comfortable with and someone she could talk to, so we made an appointment with Dr. Genie Burnett.

to be continued……………

Emma’s Descent into Therapy Part 2, Preface to Manna Treatment

PREFACE: If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” Both of these posts give a brief description of what happened. Emma is a young woman who made up a story about a story about a cyber friend being raped and claimed it brought up her own “repressed memories” of a priest of molesting her. As her attorney was about to file a lawsuit against the priest and the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse to stop the suit because she knew her lies were about to be discovered. I am that mother. Emma claims to have toxicology reports showing that I poisoned her with DDT, essentially accusing me of ATTEMPTED MURDER, but refuses to turn over these reports to my attorney. She also claims that while living with her boyfriend’s family, her boyfriend’s mother was afraid I would show up and kill her entire family. When I contacted the boyfriend’s mother, she told me that this was “ridiculous.” Emma’s boyfriend/fiance eventually broke up with her when he had his own doubts about Emma.
As always, if you have any questions or comments, contact me at: losingemma@gmail.com

Emma played Sandy when the church youth group did a dance skit from Grease, while the boy she had a crush on played Danny.  The kids did a great job and it was a lot of fun.  The cheerleader outfit came from a friend who graduated from Sandy Springs High School, Sandy Springs, Ga

Emma played Sandy when the church youth group did a dance skit from Grease. The cheerleader outfit came from a friend who graduated from Sandy Springs High School, Sandy Springs, Ga

Manna Treatment – Preface
Before I start writing about our experience with Manna Treatment, I want to first mention my complaints I filed with the State Board about Manna Treatment and Dr. Genie Burnett.

We’ve pretty much established that Emma is a teller of tales. If you’ve read my blog this long, you’ve seen the stories and some of the documentation I’ve collected from others about lies that Emma has told. Emma has a long history of lying, and this is something I want to warn parents about. In our case, therapy was detrimental to Emma and our family. Emma was allowed to go into therapy and say who knows what, and the therapist did not let Phill and I know what kind of things she was saying.

After Emma was in the custody of DFACS, Phill and I found a letter she’d written to “Lacey” the cyber friend, mentioning that her attorneys were ready to file the lawsuit and that her mother had Paranoid Borderline Personality Disorder. Or, it may have been Borderline Paranoid Personality Disorder. I will have to dig out the letter and see. It doesn’t really matter. Phill and I couldn’t understand how Dr. Genie Burnett could have diagnosed me with anything as I was not her patient. I sat in on a few partial or full sessions with Emma, but that was all. How in the world does a professional psychologist diagnose someone they are not treating? To me, this certainly seems like unprofessional conduct!
Suzie McGarvey at Lanier Counseling (who is now with North Gwinnett Counseling Associates) later told Phill and I that Dr. Genie Burnett went through a checklist with Emma and said, “Does your mother do this, this, and this?” and that was how I got the professional diagnosis of Paranoid Borderline Personality Disorder from Dr. Genie Burnett. Wow. All those years of college and earning a Ph.D. and that’s all there is to it? I think I could do that job without a college degree, and I wouldn’t charge $135/hour to do it! Phill and I were stunned. I would love to see Dr. Genie Burnett’s notes to see exactly what Emma said about me. With her ability to embellish the simplest story, I’m sure she came up with quite an entertaining tale for Dr. Burnett!
I can understand a “professional” psychologist forming an opinion about a person. When Emma was taking AP Psychology on line (which is where I’m sure she got some of her abuse stories from) she would try to tell me I was this or that. Being a teenager with one Psychology course under her belt of course made her an expert, so in addition to being a “control freak” and “micromanaging” her life, if I put something away I was anal, if I checked to make sure I locked the door, I was OCD. I can’t even remember all the labels Emma gave me. Sometimes it was funny, other times annoying, but there was no doubt Emma was into her Psych class.
When Emma’s GI doctor (Emma had a long history of vomiting issues which she now claims is because I poisoned her for years with DDT.) recommended taking Emma to a psychiatrist to put her on an antidepressant, and he wanted me to check with her psychologist (Dr. Genie Burnett, Manna Treatment) to see if she felt like this was appropriate, I asked around for some names, including asking Dr. Genie Burnett. I was kind of surprised at her enthusiasm about Emma going on an antidepressant. She told me she thought it was a good idea and then said, “I’ve been on and off antidepressants for years!” This comment made me very uncomfortable, and the way she was so glib about it, and I told Phill that it bothered me. I thought to myself, “Hmmmm, even if you were on and off antidepressants for years, would you really want to tell people that?”
I don’t remember the name of the doctor that Dr. Burnett gave us, but we lived in Hoschton, and he was in Roswell, about an hour away. Later on I asked Dr. Burnett if she could recommend anyone closer and she told me that the reason she gave us the name of that psychiatrist was that he was going to be joining her office sometime in the next year.
We were having a difficult time getting Emma to get her school work done because she wanted to sleep all the time. She was vomiting a lot and taking Zofran up to three times a day, but I would also guess that Emma was tired because when we thought she was in bed, she was pretending to be asleep, but she was up at all hours of the night with her other “mommy” Sandi McCravy (Sandra Brooks McCravy) chit chatting on the phone. If I tried to discuss anything with Dr. Burnett, there would be hell to pay. Emma always looked at it like I was “telling” on her, rather than I was trying to work on our family life. Emma cared how Dr. Genie Burnett saw her, and wanted to present herself a certain way, but her mom always wrecked things by revealing that Emma was not this perfect little mature, well-spoken young woman she wanted people to think she was. If I said anything that Emma took as criticizing of her, she would be furious with me once we left Dr. Burnett’s office, so I didn’t say too much on the few sessions I sat in on.
I sent Dr. Burnett and e-mail about some of the problems we were having with Emma and how we were having trouble getting Emma to do her school work. When I took Emma to her next session, Dr. Burnett wanted me to come in with Emma for the first few minutes, and then I was MORTIFIED when Dr. Genie Burnett read my e-mail in front of Emma. I should have stopped Dr. Burnett immediately, but I was so shocked that she did that, I just didn’t think. You want to see one angry child! Once again, the story of my teenage daughter’s life, she was livid with her mother!
The comment about being on and off antidepressants for years, diagnosing me with Paranoid Borderline Personality Disorder, and reading my e-mail in front of Emma were all listed in my complaint with the board about Dr. Genie Burnett at Manna Treatment.

Later, I’ll get into how we chose Manna Treatment and Dr. Genie Burnett and while I have no idea what Emma said during her sessions, I can tell you how Emma acted before and after sessions, and things that she talked about to me after her sessions.

Emma’s Descent into Therapy Part 1 (UPDATED)

***************UPDATED APRIL 13, 2014**********************

PREFACE: If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” Both of these posts give a brief description of what happened. Emma is a young woman who made up a story about a story about a cyber friend being raped and claimed it brought up her own “repressed memories” of a priest of molesting her. As her attorney was about to file a lawsuit against the priest and the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse to stop the lawsuit because she knew her lies were about to be discovered. I am that mother. Emma claims to have toxicology reports showing that her mother poisoned her with DDT, essentially accusing her mother of ATTEMPTED MURDER, but refuses to turn over these reports to her mother’s attorney. She also claims that while living with her boyfriend’s family, her boyfriend’s mother was afraid Emma’s mother would show up and kill her entire family. When Emma’s mother contacted the boyfriend’s mother, she told me that this was “ridiculous.” Emma’s boyfriend/fiance eventually broke up with her when he had his own doubts about Emma.
As always, if you have any questions or comments, contact me at: losingemma@gmail.com

Emma’s first experience with therapy was with the Tree House, in Winder, Ga. The Tree House is an organization that supports children and families in Jackson and Barrow County, Ga. I am appalled that Emma wasted the time of this facility when there is such legitimate need for their services.

As I mentioned earlier, on Emma’s dad’s birthday, March 21, 2010, Emma told us the story of her “repressed memories” and claimed to have been molested by the priest over a period of several months when she was 12 years old. Two days later, a Jackson County DFACS worker, Cecelia Dove and a sheriff’s Deputy (Janis Mangum, who is now the Sheriff of Jackson County) showed up at our home. Emma became hysterical and threw her arms around me, crying that she didn’t want to be taken away. She sobbed and held on to me tightly, and it took a few minutes for the three of us to calm her down. Perhaps she became hysterical because she realized the magnitude of what she’d done no that the authorities were involved. Deputy Mangum assured Emma that she was not going to be taken away and that she was there just to make sure Emma was safe and that the priest no longer had access to Emma. I explained that the priest had been an interim priest at our church for about a year while the church went through the process of hiring a new priest.

I was also very shaken to have DFACS and a sheriff’s deputy come to my home, and it took us several days to figure out who had called DFACS. Emma denied up and down telling anyone other than one of her church youth leaders about being “molested” but we later found out that Emma was failing Physics, so her excuse to her teacher for not doing her work was that she was having problems because she had been molested. It was the physics teacher who called DFACS. I have pages and pages of letters Emma was writing to “Lacey” during this time, and she could also chat with “Lacey” on the computer when she was supposed to be doing her school work. Emma is a very smart girl, and there was no reason for her to fail physics. She wasn’t doing her work, and needed a good excuse, so she used her “molestation” story.

Unfortunately, Phill and I, as well as our Deacon blamed another woman for calling DFACS. After Emma told us about being molested, Phill called one of Emma’s Youth Group leaders, a young woman who was a school psychologist, and he told her about Emma’s accusation. This lady worked in educational testing, not with abuse, but we figured, working for the school system, she felt obligated to turn Emma into DFACS. That Sunday, we went to church, and I saw this woman crying in church because she knew we were angry with her. Emma never said a word. I saw this woman sobbing when she took communion. She was so deeply hurt that we accused her of sending the authorities to our door when she was another one of Emma’s innocent victims. Later on, I whole heartedly apologized to her, and I think she forgave us, but I will never forget the pain we caused her. Shortly after that, she quit working with the youth group.

After telling her story to Deputy Mangum, Cecelia Dove (DFACS Social Worker) spoke to us and gave me the name of the Tree House and said Emma could receive counseling there. Emma was completely opposed to counseling, and I was the one who pushed her to go. I thought she might need some “professional” help. Emma argued with me and claimed that she’d read that girls who’d been molested like she was did just as well talking things over with their friends as opposed to going to therapy. One problem with this was that Emma really didn’t have any friends. She didn’t have any girlfriends she hung out with. She e-mailed and texted “Lacey,” her cyber friend whom Emma claimed had been raped and tried to commit suicide, but the two girls had never met in person. Emma was also friends with Kayla Benifield Weaver, but only saw her for a weekend or so once or twice a year when Kayla was visiting her mom. Emma talked to me a lot about everything, but I really felt she needed someone other than her mother.

Phill had my calendars, so I don’t have the dates, but sometime around May, Emma started therapy at the Tree House. Her counselor was a young woman, Ms. M, who I believe was working on her Master’s Degree at UGA and interning at the Tree House. She was very sweet, and I thought Emma would like her except she had a Hispanic name, and Emma had some bias against Hispanics, complained about the illegal immigrant problems in this country, and complained about Hispanic kids at school.

After 3 or 4 sessions, Ms. M. called me into the room after meeting with Emma and said that there was really no reason to bring Emma to therapy because Emma would not talk to her. Emma later told her other therapists that she did not like the Tree House because they treated her like a little kid and gave her stickers. (She never mentioned receiving sticker to me, although once I think they gave her a snack of a pack of cookies or crackers.)

Phill and I discussed giving Emma a break from therapy. We were planning a trip to visit my sister up north at the end of June, so we thought we would wait until we got back to have Emma start seeing someone else. In the meantime, Emma had quit going to church, and did not want to go with the youth group on the big trip to Cherokee N.C. that they had been planning and raising money for all year. Emma had quit going to youth group. I suspected that part of this was because it was a very small group, and the boy that Emma liked and had spent quite a bit of time with at church activities and youth group, was no longer interested in her, and there was a new girl at church who seemed to be spending a lot of time at church following this young man around. It was just the typical teenage stuff, but I think Emma was no longer comfortable in the group because for a while there, the kids, and even some of the adults thought Emma and this boy were a couple, even though they never actually dated. I think Emma was very hurt when this young man was no longer interested in her. Emma pretty much did nothing but sit around the house. She hung around me a lot, running errands or doing whatever I happened to be doing around the house, and in the evenings she would want to watch a movie or tv with me.

I had been discussing with my good friend Sandi (Sandra Brooks McCravy) that I hated Emma just sitting around the house, and I wished she would go with her youth group on their trip, but at that point, several people in the church knew about Emma accusation of being sexually molested, and we had filed a complaint with the church, so I didn’t feel like I should push Emma to go if she really didn’t want to. Sandi suggested that Emma could come help with Vacation Bible School at her current church, Sunrise Baptist Church in Lawrenceville, Ga. http://www.sunrisebaptist.com Since Sandi lived about 35-40 minutes away from us, there in Lawrenceville, she suggested that Emma stay at their home for the week. Phill and I thought this would be a great break for Emma, and I took Sandi up on her offer.

During the week of Vacation Bible School (VBS) the kids were at the church in the morning, and then back home to Sandy’s by early afternoon. During time, I called my oldest sister in Ct., and broke the news to her about Emma’s molestation. We were planning a trip to visit them at the end of June, and I felt like I needed to tell her, and I also needed her big sisterly support.

Also, during the week of VBS, one of our neighbors who also went to our church, was in a hospice facility, dying of cancer. Our deacon had called me and told me that he didn’t have much time left, and this gentleman had trained the acolytes, and had been very fond of Emma, so I really wanted to take Emma to see him. He was alert and happy to see us, and if I remember right, he passed away the next day with his loving family around him.

When I picked Emma up one afternoon to take her to visit our neighbor in the hospice, I told Emma that I’d told my sister about the “molestation.” Emma became furious with me. She asked me why I told her, and I said it was because when we went up there in a few weeks, my sister would know that something was wrong, and also because she loved us and I felt like we needed her support. Emma barely spoke to me that afternoon, and when I took her back to Sandi McCravy’s house, Emma got out of the car without speaking and went into the house without saying a word to me. I went in and spoke to Sandi for a few minutes and told her why Emma was mad at me.

It was around this time that Emma developed a crush on Johnathan McCravy, Sandi and Greg’s younger son. Sometime later, it may have been 6 months later when Phill and I were going through Emma’s room, I found a letter Emma had written to her cyber friend “Lacey” about her crush on Johnathan. There was nothing dramatic in it, just the sweet typical stuff teenagers write about being in love.

At the end of June, we went to visit my sister and her husband for a week in CT. Emma was rude and nasty for the entire week, barely speaking to my sister and brother-in-law the whole visit. This hurt me because my sister had been the greatest aunt to Emma. She spent time with her, sent her cards and gifts, remembered her on every holiday, etc. She had adored Emma her whole life, and at 16, Emma was a rude and nasty brat to her. Several times my sister walked in to find Emma on the phone, and she would quickly get off. It wasn’t until later that I realized all these phone calls were to Sandi McCravy. Sandi Even called Emma while we were at the beach for fireworks, and they talked for about an hour. I was also a little surprised that Sandi knew we were having a family picnic at the beach and she still stayed on the phone with Emma so long that night. I thought it was rude of Sandi as well as rude of Emma, but then again, Emma was being so unpleasant, why not let her talk on the phone and just enjoy the adult company without Emma?

When we came back from CT, Emma started therapy with Dr. Genie Burnett (Dr. Elizabeth Genie Burnett) Manna Treatment, Duluth, Ga. http://mannatreatment.com/home

Coming up in Part 2, Manna Treatment

Southeast Electric Flight Festival

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I think this photo was around 2002, when Emma donated a dinosaur puppet for her dad to use in a pilot in one of his planes. It was really cute.

PREFACE: If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” Both of these posts give a brief description of what happened. Emma is a young woman who made up a story about a story about a cyber friend being raped and claimed it brought up her own “repressed memories” of a priest of molesting her. As her attorney was about to file a lawsuit against the priest and the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse to stop the lawsuit because she knew her lies were about to be discovered. I am that mother. Emma claims to have toxicology reports showing that her mother poisoned her with DDT but refuses to turn over these reports to her mother’s attorney. She also claims that while living with her boyfriend’s family, her boyfriend’s mother was afraid Emma’s mother would show up and kill her entire family. When Emma’s mother contacted the boyfriend’s mother, she told me that this was “ridiculous.”
As always, if you have any questions or comments, contact me at: losingemma@gmail.com

It is a rainy Georgia night, and I was thinking about how Emma is probably down in Americus, Ga. for SEFF (Southeast Electric Flight Festival) to work as Jeff Meyers’ “Executive Assistant.” SEFF doesn’t start until tomorrow (April 7-13) but Phill always liked going down early. SEFF was something he looked forward to all year, and as soon as it was over, he was already planning for the next year. Emma didn’t really care about flying, but she liked running things and being in charge, and she is really Jeff’s right hand. She also liked the pay she received. It was very generous of Jeff to pay the “volunteers” who worked very hard all week.

Phill always liked camping at SEFF, but Emma preferred a hotel, so I was just listening to the rain and am glad to know she won’t be camping in a tent tonight. Emma and I were never quite the “roughing it” kind of girls!

With all the “together time” of homeschooling, I had to admit I enjoyed our little break and having some time to myself when Emma went to SEFF with her dad, but then as soon as she was gone, I missed her, too. I could only talk to her early in the morning or late at night, and usually for just a few minutes because she was so busy, but I always enjoyed hearing about what she was doing. Really though, I didn’t hear too much about it until Emma got home, and then she talked and talked and pretty much gave me every detail of her week. Phill got a kick out of hearing Emma’s name paged over the intercom. Who knows, maybe the SEFF experience has prepared Emma for things she’ll be doing in her professional life, in whatever career she decides to go into.

Anyway, I just wanted to say that I was thinking of my baby girl and hope she has a wonderful week at SEFF.
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Emma and SEFF (Southeast Electric Flight Festival)

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***UPDATED MARCH 9 2014***
If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” Both of these posts give a brief description of what happened. As Emma’s mom, I am blogging my experiences with Emma and the things she did/does. This is a child who made up a story about rape, accused a priest of molesting her, and then as her attorney was about to file a lawsuit against the priest and the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse to stop the lawsuit because she knew her lies were about to be discovered. Emma was recently living in Ohio at the home of her fiance’s grandparents, attending Wright State University http://www.wright.edu/, and talking about getting married to T. Emma claims to have the TOXICOLOGY REPORT to prove that her mother poisoned her with DDT and that she had to move to Ohio to get away from her mother. (My attorney has been waiting for months for that toxicology report.) She also claims her future mother-in-law lives in fear that Emma’s mother will show up and kill her entire family. A while back I received an e-mail from T’s mother that said, “…. I am not afraid of you or fear that you are going to murder me or my family. That is ridiculous!!!” P.S.T., you are very welcome.

380asm

As a child, Phill built and flew RC planes, but had quit them before I’d ever known him. Years ago, at my job, I met someone who flew, and told this gentleman, “Oh, my husband did that as a kid.” He made it sound like so much fun, I went home and talked to Phill about it and encouraged him to get back into it. (It didn’t take much encouragement.) He picked out a plane for his birthday, and his hobby grew and grew. It wasn’t long before our house was full of planes, plane parts, radio parts, materials for building, and odds and ends that I couldn’t have identified.

Phill got involved with some local groups like the Scenic RC Flyers in Winder/Statham, and the Electric Drones in Jackson County, near our home, but his favorite RC event was SEFF (Southeast Electric Flight Festival) which is held in Americus, Ga. http://www.seffweek.com/ This year, SEFF will be held April 7th-13th. Phill talked about SEFF all year long. Before SEFF, he spent months planning what planes he was going to build and take, and after the event, he talked about it for months and made plans for the next year. He volunteered with SEFF, which paid for his trip and hotel, and his main job was being in charge of the raffle. It is a big raffle where vendors donate lots of prizes, and Phill always bought a lot of tickets, so he came home with at least a few prizes. Because I was homeschooling Emma, and worked at an arts program where the end of the year program coincided with SEFF, plus the fact that we had 3 dogs and a foster dog at home, I never attended but finally planned on going in 2011, the year Emma’s really turned into a mess. Although her actions stopped me from attending, I don’t think it stopped Phill, and I believe he took Emma with him. Phill’s family could be falling apart, but he was not going to miss his big week of airplanes.

I don’t remember what year it was when Phill took Emma with him to Seff. I believe she was in 7th or 8th grade. Phill had volunteered the year before and thought it would be great if Emma could go and help. It sounded like a good opportunity for Emma to get to try something new, and as a homeschooling mom, it gave me a break as well.

Phill had tried to get Emma interested in RC planes, but she never was. She built a simple plane with his help when she was about 10-12, and she would take the controls if he took her out to the field, but she was never that interested. It just wasn’t her cup of tea. SEFF, however, would become an event that Emma looked forward to every year.

I’m not sure of his title, but SEFF was run by a man named Jeff Meyers of the Fayetteville Flyers. He may have started the event, I’m not really sure. From what Phill and Emma told me, it’s a week long RC event where there are vendors, “pilots” (the folks who fly RC planes) and lots of socializing with dinners, drinking, poker, entertainment, contests, etc. It became the largest electric RC plane event in the U.S. or maybe the world, and one year they broke the world record of the most planes in the air at one time. Phill was partiulcarly proud of being part of this event which can be seen here:

http://preview.tinyurl.com/meojwdw

Seff takes place in Americus Ga. at Mac Hodges field:

Hodges Hobbies‎
428 Neil Hodges Road
Andersonville, GA 31711
(866) 924-9505
hodgeshobbies.com‎

Phill liked to camp at SEFF so that he could be in the middle of the action all the time, but Emma was not a “roughing it” kind of girl and preferred to stay in a hotel. She was also afraid of staying in a tent, that the boogie man would get her. If Emma went to bed at night, from what Phill told me, he was close by, drinking beer with the guys or whatever, but never far away from Emma. Emma was the kind of kid who got nervous taking a walk in the neighborhood by herself, so it didn’t surprise me that Emma didn’t like going to bed by herself when Phill was still up. They always ended up compromising and spent a couple of nights in a tent, and then the rest of the time in a hotel.

The first year, Emma’s duties were fairly minimal. I remember her talking about things like labeling the beer bottles. (One of the RC members made an annual “SEFF Beer.”) Every year, her duties grew, and she loved being Jeff’s right hand and was given the title “Administrative Assistant.” Phill and I were both very proud of Emma and the job she did every year at SEFF. The child who, in typical kid fashion, couldn’t do her chores at home, or who lied about having done them until mom or dad went to check, worked her tail off at SEFF and did a great job. No one had to remind her what her jobs were and no one had to tell her over and over again to do them. Maybe she was growing up! One year after SEFF was over, I believe Emma was in about 9th grade, Jeff sent out a nice e-mail about SEFF and while I can’t remember word for word what he said, there was something in there about how he thought he was going to quit SEFF until Emma came along and made his job so much easier. Phill and I couldn’t have been more proud.

During SEFF week, Emma and I talked on the phone every day, although sometimes not for long as she was very busy. When she would get home from SEFF, she would talk to me for hours about everything that went on. One of the things Emma was responsible for, as she told me, was vendor placement, and she had to deal with vendors complaining about their spots. She got a little frustrated with some of the vendors giving her a hard time, but it sounded like, from what she told me, that she handled her responsibilities well, and I thought she was getting some great experience for what would be coming down the road for her in real life one day. To make things even better to Emma, Jeff started paying the volunteers. I believe Emma came home with something like $300-$350 after spending a week at SEFF. For a kid who’d never done more than babysat, that was a nice chunk of change! Even though this was supposed to be “volunteering,” I couldn’t object to Emma being paid because from what she and Phill told me, she put in some long hours for the week she was down there.

The only thing that concerned me was that Emma never seemed to get along with kids her own age. Not that there were a lot of kids at SEFF, but one year, a couple of girls who I believe were the granddaughters of one of the “Hodge Hounds” (some of the SEFF regulars) who wanted to volunteer. Emma, for whatever reason, didn’t get along with these girls and complained frequently about them. From what she told me, the drove the golf carts which were used as shuttles, and they were lazy and didn’t work as hard as Emma did. Emma always seemed to have trouble making friends her own age. I’ll get more into this topic later when I talk about Emma’s schools and schooling, but just like the church youth group, Emma loved running things, but didn’t seem to make friends if she was around anyone for any length of time. She could see them once or twice a year and leave messages on facebook, but she never had any close friends that she saw regularly. She got along well with adults, and younger kids, like the little girls of Mike and Wendy Timms, who also went to SEFF. Emma loved being “big sister” to younger kids like the Timms girls, who were also homeschooled. (Emma would later take advatage of the Timms family while claiming to be “abused” but more on that later.

Another interesting note is the year that Emma claimed to be “molested.” On March 21, 2010, her dad’s birthday, Emma confessed to her dad and me that she had been molested by the priest at our church a few years before when she was 12 years old. She made up a story about a cyber friend being raped and claimed that this friend called Emma from the hospital ER. Emma then claimed that this incident brought up her “repressed memories” of her own molestation. SEFF 2010 was held about a month later, April 22-25, 2010, and Phill was not going to miss it. We talked it over and decided it might good for Emma to go to get away from all we’d been through dealing with the police, detectives, the church, DFACS, the sheriff’s department, etc. in the wake of Emma’s accusation.

Phill took Emma to SEFF 2010, but he told me she mostly hid out in the tent. It sounded like she did not do much in the way of assisting Jeff like she had in previous years. I spoke to Emma on the phone every day, and she was very paranoid about the priest finding her and coming after her. I tried to reassure her that the priest would have no way of knowing that she was at this RC event down in Americus, Georgia, but Emma was adamant that he would find out and come after her. Phill finally had to tell Jeff what was going on because Emma wasn’t doing her job. Of course, Emma got lots of attention and sympathy for being the sexually abused child. I now suspect that her paranoia was her guilty conscience, although I have often wondered if Emma has a conscience. I’m not sure how Phill now justifies Emma’s behavior. He knows Emma made up the rape story, and he knows Emma wasn’t molested. I wasn’t there, in Americus, when Emma was acting so fearful and paranoid about the priest coming after her, but from what Phill told me, and from speaking to Emma, I can picture just how she behaved. Does Phill actually still believe this child was sexually molested by a priest?

As always, if you have any questions or comments, you can e-mail me: losingemma@gmail.com
Sorry, no time to proofread, so bear with me and I’ll work on it later.

More Lies

Because I am doing this blog sort of piece-meal, I will preface each entry with a synopsis for new readers who may not know Emma’s story.   Eventually, I will re-do the blog, and put the entire story in order.

PREFACE: At the age of 16, Emma Roey (Emma Kate Roey) made up a lie about a friend  being raped, and then claimed that her friend’s rape brought up repressed memories of being molested by a priest at the age of 12.  Emma told these stories to: DFACS, the Jackson County Sheriff’s Department, the Gwinnett County police, four attorneys, 7 therapists, two psychiatrists, two psychologists, the staff at Peachford Psychiatric hospital, friends and family, church officials from two different churches, teachers, her high school counselor, etcEmma’s attorney had just contacted us and was about to file a lawsuit on her behalf against the church and the priest, and Emma knew she was about to be caught in a very big lie, so she accused her mother of physical abuse to stop the lawsuit.

Emma Kate Roey
Emma Katherine Roey

A couple days after Emma’s 17th birthday, she had someone call DFACS to say that she was physically abused by her mother.  The police came to our home, and then DFACS came to our home and wanted us to provide a place for Emma to go.  (I was later told the do this so as not to incur any cost for taking in a child.)

DFACS did not tell me that I was the one being accused of abusing my child, only that she needed to leave the home.  During all this, I was on and off the phone with our pastor, Fr. George Ivey, and my friend, Janice.  Fr. George suggested that maybe someone from our old church had called DFACS as retaliation for the lawsuit we were filing against the church.  I mentioned this to Emma, and she kept bringing up the name of a woman for whom she had babysat for.  I thought this odd because this woman had been very supportive to us.  I talked to Emma a couple of times on the phone after she left out home, and she continued to bring up that she thought this woman might have called DFACS.  of course, at the time, I had no idea that this was all Emma’s doing.

Emma kept requesting to go to my friend, Sandra Brooks McCravy’s home, but for some reason I did not feel comfortable with this idea.  Sandra had been one of my closest friends for the past seven years, and Emma had a crush on her son, Johnathan.  I was not aware that there was an inappropriate relationship going on between Emma and Sandra, and the two were on the phone late at night, when Phill and I thought Emma was asleep.  (I will publish the phone records later.)

At 3 am, our pastor, Fr. George(Holy Trinity Anglican Church) and his wife, Paulette, came over and got Emma and took her to their home.  Because they were going out of town, we had to make arrangements for Emma to go somewhere else, and my friend Janice agreed to take Emma.  (I have mentioned Janice in an earlier post, and you can read her comments on Emma’s stay with her in that post.)

We had known Janice for about 7 years, and for the past few years always did Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners with Janice, as well as occasional cook outs for Memorial Day, July 4th, or Labor Day.  Emma and I saw Janice almost every Saturday where we volunteered with a dog/cat rescue.  Emma loved Janice and called her “Aunt Janice.”  When Janice called, Emma would check the caller id, and grab the phone before I could, and frequently ended up talking to Janice longer than I did.  At the end of their phone conversations, Emma always said, “I love you.” to Janice.   Janice proofread Emma’s English papers, and even talked to a friend of hers who was a judge in juvenile court, on Emma’s behalf, when we believed Emma had been molested.   We had been  to Janice’s home many times.  Janice lived in a highly Hispanic neighborhood, and Emma did not like the neighborhood.

While at Janice’s, Emma lied to Janice over and over again.  Although Phill had asked Sandra Brooks McCravy not to contact Emma until her got her home, and we asked Emma not to talk to Sandra, they both lied to us and violated our wishes.  Sandra Brooks McCravy even went to far as to slip Emma a tracphone and hid it in a Christmas gift that she dropped off at the home of Fr. George.

Below are some facebook e-mails that Emma sent to Sandra during the time Emma spent at Janice’s home:

Emma’s FB posts to Sandi

Dec. 24, 4:25 pm

Hey. I am doing okay. I have a house phone in my room and will call you late tonight. I changed my facebook password so they won’t be able to see my messages. I have called Suzie (Suzie McGarvey, Lanier Counseling, Emma’s therapist.) but haven’t heard back yet. Apparently the DFACS worker was here for less than three minutes. What a joke. I hope Fr. George comes back early!! This is just so crazy. And as horrible as it has been, I still miss my family. I hope Suzie can make my dad see reason and I can go to you on Monday. Please, God. I am figuring out how many chocolates, how much popcorn, etc I can eat per day. This definitely qualifies as Worst Christmas of my Life So Far. Hopefully Worst Christmas Ever. My parents DID bring me some clothes. Guess what they brought me?  Shorts.  My summer shorts.  Just exactly what I want to wear on this 42 degree day.  I just hope this is over soon.

NOTE:  I had packed up some clothes for Phill to take to Emma while she was at Janice’s.  As  most of you know, teenagers are not the neatest creatures, and there was no order as to how Emma put her clothes away.  I took some jeans out of a drawer and did not notice that one pair was a pair of capris.  There were no shorts in her bag of clothes, but there was one pair of capris, because folded up, they looked pretty much like the rest of her jeans.

Dec. 24 2010 6:04pm

Have fun at the family’s house. I haven’t heard from Suzie today. I hope will soon, but I don’t know. I am typing this on my phone so I can’t really format or edit it, sorry you have to wade through my stream of consciousness. Oh this is just so scary. My biggest hope is for this week to pass quickly. Thanks for your prayers. We need them. I miss you guys soooooooo much. I wish I could spend Christmas with you, but I know that’s not going to happen. I talked to my friend Rob’s family. They will be home Monday and I hope that if I can’t come to you, I can go to them. We’ll see. But ohmigoodness I just hate this. I know I am loved but I am so far away from the people I’m close to, and it’s so horrible to feel alone. I am really scared in this neighborhood. They are making lots of noise and I don’t know what they’re doing. It’s so loud. I may have to take sleeping meds tonight, I think, if I’m going to get any sleep. I don’t think I’ve slept ten hours in the past two nights. I’m too nervous. Oh I miss you so much. I miss my parents. I just wish I could be with somebody. Suzie my not call me till Monday. I am making a cross stitch but it’s scaring me. It’s birds. It is just not looking good. Oh well. I might try something simpler, this has so many colors. I want to make you one for Christmas. Maybe I will even design my own. At least it keeps me occupied. If I stuffed them with potpurie (oh that is spelled so wrong) they would smell good but would it last? I don’t know. I love you. I really hope I can see you Monday.

Dec. 24, 2010, 7:22

Ohmmigoodness. They are shooting. I hear them. I have no clue what they are shooting but it is LOUD. I can hear it

Note:  Emma claimed to not be sleeping, but she was actually up at night, and Janice told us sleeping a lot during the day.  She did ask Janice for some sleeping pills, but Janice would not have given them to her, even if she had any.  As for the “shooting” that frightened Emma so badly, Janice’s Mexican neighbors shoot off fireworks on every major holiday.  Emma knew this, as she had been at Janice’s many times on holidays, and had heard the fireworks there when we visited on other holidays.  DFACS had checked into the neighborhood before Emma went, and found it to be a safe area.  Fr. George Ivey and Paulette drove Emma over to Janice’s and later told me, from the way Emma described it, they thought they were going into a bad area and were surprised to see what a nice neighborhood it was.

A List of Lies

(UPDATED 10/31/12–New material at end of post.)

Emma Roey (Emma Katherine Roey, Emma Kate Roey) made up a story about a friend being raped, accused a priest of molesting her, and then as her attorney was about to file a lawsuit against the church, Emma accused her mother of physically abusing her to stop the lawsuit because she knew the attorneys would be investigating her rape story since that was the supposed catalyst for remembering that she was molested when she was 12 years old.  After this last accusation, I began researching stories Emma had previously told us.  Below are some of Emma’s lies that I have documented.  I will be adding more as well as some stories that I have not bothered to verify either because I don’t want to disturb the people that are involved or because I believe I have enough documentation to show that Emma is quite accomplished in making up stories.

Emma Katherine Roey
Emma Kate Roey

Emma met  when L. when she was in Georgia Virtual School, her 2nd semester of 9th grade in 2009.  They had an on-line English class together and were assigned as pen pals for an English project.  The two girls became friends writing letters, e-mailing, texting, and Facebook.  As far as I know, the two girls have never met in person.

On Dec. 19, 2009, her 16th birthday, Emma was at her church youth group meeting.  When Phill and I went to pick her up, Emma immediately told us that her friend L. had called her from the hospital, and told her that she had been raped.  Emma was very upset and said L. was crying hysterically and difficult to understand.   Before we left, I was talking to one of the youth group leaders, and told her what Emma had said.   Emma got very upset with me for telling the youth leader what she had told us about L.

Over the next few days, Emma said she tried to call L. several times, but couldn’t reach her, so she called her sister, E.  Over that week Emma changed the story and said that L. had been raped some time previously and was in the hospital because she tried to commit suicide.    Emma said L.’s extended family had been over for a family gathering, when L. had taken some pills, laid down on her mother’s bed, and was later found unresponsive by a family member.  She was taken to the hospital.  I did not know L. or her family, so I did not call the family.   Later on, Emma said that L. told her that the man who raped her threatened to kill her family if she told anyone who he was.  Over the next couple of months ,  I asked Emma how L. was doing .  Emma said that L. was in therapy and didn’t want to talk about what happened.  Emma told me that L. was molested as a child and volunteered with a group at her church that counseled or supported other victims of molestation.

Sometime during the summer of 2009, Emma told me that L.’s mother had breast cancer.  She said L. had been homeschooled, but was going to public school for 10th grade because her mother was too sick to homeschool her.  Emma told me, at least twice, that L. had called or texted her to tell her that her mother was hospitalized several times that summer.  On at least two occasions, Emma told me that L.’s mom was so sick, that the doctors thought she might not survive.

On March 21, 2010, her dad’s birthday, Emma told Phill and I that she had been molested at our church when she was 12 years old.  According to Emma, L.’s phone call from the hospital, telling her she was raped, was the catalyst for her coming forward about her molestation by the priest at our former church.

My attorney, verified with L.’s father, that L. was never in the hospital, never raped, never molested, never volunteered counseling other children who were victims of molestation.

An excerpt from a letter Emma wrote to L.:

I was teaching my mom iris folding, the technique I used on the card I sent you (you should have it now).  I love her, but it’s sooo hard to teach her.  She has arthritis in her hands and she’s sooo slow.  It’s like, I could do this ten times faster and not waste half the material she does, but it’s really important to her to do it herself.  And on top of that, she gets really angry when I try to keep her from making mistakes.  She wants to do it her way, but she will get really frustrated when hers don’t turn out as nicely as mine do (because she refuses to take my advice, which I give in a very respectful tone that still gets labeled “smart-a**”).  It gets me so frustrated, because it’s not even fun for me anymore.  What’s worse yet is when she wants to ‘help’ with my projects.  But she invariably ruins them!  So I mostly try to work when she’s not home.

 

Note:  Emma and I spent a lovely afternoon making iris folded cards.  We knew a  couple of people who were going to be having babies, so we made cards for them, and then made some generic cards.  I’d never made one before, but knew the basics of iris folding, having read about it and having watched Emma make them.  It is a very easy technique.  My cards came out very nicely.  I do not have arthritis in my hands, and I have no idea what projects Emma is accusing me of wanting to help with and then ruining for her.  I’ve have spent countless hours teaching Emma beading techniques, or beading with her while we watch a movie, as that is my  hobby, and I never ruined any of her projects.

**************************************************

Jerri 6:09am Jun 19, 2011(Email exchange between myself and a neighbor Emma rode the school bus with.)

I wanted to ask you about when you said Emma exaggerated the drug problems at the school and a couple more questions. I had wondered about this because Emma told us that drugs were sold on the bus all the time, that kids smoked on the bus, and the driver didn’t do anything about it, and things like that, as well as overhearing kids talking about possibly being pregnant. I thought she might be exaggerating to try to get us to pull her out of school, When she went to the freshman orientation, or the first day of school (I can’t remember which), Emma said she sat next to a girl named B. who told her she had a 4 yr. old. I thought this seemed odd, but Emma said she was repeating 9th grade. I know you don’t know everyone in the school, but did you know if anyone with a child this old?

Did you see drugs being sold on the bus? Did kids smoke on the bus?

Another story Emma told us was that J. got caught having sex with her boyfriend, who also rode the bus, and that Mrs. B. came out when J. was getting on the bus and told the bus driver not to let her sit with him in front of everyone on the bus. I thought this was a little bizarre, but never questioned it. Now I wonder if Emma made it up.

Can you tell me if any of these stories are true or not? I’m just looking into a lot of things Emma has told us, and trying to sort out the truth.

Jerri 6:12am Jun 19

Oops, sorry. I wasn’t finished when I hit the enter key.
I also wanted to ask you about a story Emma told us after K’s. b.day party when she was in 9th, and you were in 10th grade. She said that one of the girls was pregnant and had had an abortion. Of course, this wasn’t something I was going to ask any of you, or verify the story. Then, at the end of the school year, she said that after prom one of the girls (you, K, M, K2) thought they were pregnant again.

Neighbors’
Daughter: (after a phone conversation)

woah. none of us have ever been pregnant, ever. and for that matter, none of us were promiscuous at all. these stories are starting to greatly irritate me, because they are such blatant and horrible lies.

B. was a girl who had a baby when she was 16, back in 2008. So no, the child was not 4 (and still isn’t 4), but that baby does exist.  No one had sex or ever smoked on the bus. i don’t remember Mrs. B. doing that, but honestly I didn’t ride the bus everyday.

Note:  At the time, I did not tell this young lady that she was the one Emma was talking about.  Emma claimed that she got drunk and high at a party and ended up pregnant.  In Sept. or Oct., Emma went to a birthday party for another girl that rode the bus with them, and she came home in tears.  She said that (name removed) had told her that her parents took her to have an abortion, and she didn’t tell
Emma about it before she did it because she knew Emma would try to talk her of it.

On Tue, Jul 26, 2011 at 9:01 AM, Jerri > wrote:
> No problem, (Name Removed)   My attorney has collected some information on Emma,
> and she’s been lying for years.  I think both Phill and Emma are going to be
> shocked over some of what we’ve found.  Phill has wanted to believe
> everything Emma says.   If you want, I will mail a copy to your parents, so
> you all can see what was going on.  My attorney is gathering a few
> statements that he needs signed, and then we will be presenting all of it to
> Emma’s therapist.
>
> A couple of other things I thought of that I wanted to ask you about. There
> was a boy in the other  part of Deer Creek (Fawn Ct?) that Emma pointed out
> to me one day when he was walking in the neighborhood, and she said he sold
> drugs.  Of course she told me he sold drugs on the bus, and you told me you
> never saw drugs sold on the bus, so I’m doubting the whole thing.  Would you
> know who she was talking about and if he actually did sell drugs.
>
> Another story she told was that your brother got arrested and was in jail,
> but your parents didn’t know, and he’d been in jail before.  She said he was
> arrested for pot.  I don’t want to intrude on (Name Removed) life or anything, if
> there’s any truth to this, but if it’s completely fabricated, would you let
> me know so I can add this to the list.
>
> Thanks,
> Jerri

Wow. I don’t know how I missed this message. I’m not sure about that
other boy selling pot, but I can tell you for a FACT my brother has
NEVER been arrested, and certainly not for drugs. I am absolutely
livid right now. It is one thing to be lied about, but when she brings
my family into this, she has gone too damn far. What a terrible human
being she is.

Jerri Roey3:27pm Sep 20

(Name Removed), Would you just verify something for me. My husband is trying to say that you told Emma all the horrible things she told us about you (that you got pregnant, your parents took you to have an abortion, that you thought you were pregnant again after the prom…..lots of drinking and drugs stories). He is trying to defend Emma by saying that you made up this stuff, true or not, and told it to Emma, so that’s where she got it from. I think that Emma made it all up, trying to make you look bad (as well as the other girls on the bus). I just want it in writing to gove to my attorney. Again, I will remove your name. Just let me know if you ever told Emma any of those things.

Oh, and you told her that your parents took you to have an abortion. Please let me know if you ever told Emma any of these stories.

(Name Removed)6:56pm Sep 20

Of course Emma made it up. Why would I make up horrible things about myself? I’m sorry, but this is getting ridiculous. I never told Emma about any pregnancies or abortions, because they didn’t happen. Not to me, and not to any my friends. She is lying, and frankly, it’s sad to see your husband believing her. She is clearly unstable, and I am starting to think he isn’t much better.

**********************************************

E-mail exchange between H. and myself:

On 6/27/2011 12:58 PM, Jerri wrote:

Hi H.,

This is your neighbor, Jerri.

We’ve been having a lot of problems with our daughter, Emma, in regards to lying.  She told us she’d been molested, but now I think that wasn’t true.  Before she came up with the molestation, she tried to tell stories about Phill, but I would not tolerate it. I’m am finding out about some other whoppers she’s told, and am keeping a list to present to her therapist.  Most recently, Emma has accused me of child abuse, that when she turned 17, I started hitting her, shoving her, etc.  She did that right before a lawsuit was about to be filed on her behalf over the molestation.  (I believe she wanted to take the focus off the “molestation”, so she went from being a victim of child molestation to being a victim of child abuse.)  It’s a really long story, but there’s one story I wanted to ask you about.

When Emma rode the bus to JCCHS, she claimed that one day you came out to the bus and told the bus driver not to let J. sit with a certain boy.  I don’t know his name, but she said he lives in the 2nd house on the right as you enter the subdivision.

Emma claimed that you all had caught the two kids having sex and that was why she was not allowed to sit with this boy.  I believe she said J. had to sit at the front of the bus with the younger kids.

Anyway, I don’t want to get too personal, but could you just tell me if this story is true or not?

If you would e-mail or call me:

From: H. Sent: Wednesday, June 29, 2011 4:17 PM

To: Jerri Subject: Re: Question

Hello Jerri
Sorry to hear about the problems you are having with Emma, there is something terribly wrong with our society with the problems young girls are creating for themselves and their families.
First J. was caught sneaking out of the house, but it was to go see the boy who did live in the second house on the right as you enter the subdivision with his guardians.  I did not approach the bus driver however about where or with whom J. sat.  Actually we realized that there was very little control we had over her behavior outside of our home given J.’s age and past.  We decided along with (the boy’s) guardians to encourage an appropriate relationship between the two rather than forbidding that they see each other on the bus or at school and wait and see what happened.  We even met with him to get to know him and what he planned on doing in life and sure enough it was over in a few months.
Second I met Emma one day while I was out walking and asked how she like Jackson Co. HS.  She told me she didn’t like it and had been sick and in the hospital.  She said she had all A’s and had been making up the time and doing the work but she was told she was going to be failed anyway.  I just remember how odd I thought this was because I volunteered at the HS counseling office once a week and I knew they had credit recovery in addition to knowing that the HS bent over backwards to try to work with students and get them graduated.  I remember thinking that something just didn’t seem right and there had to be more to it however, as a volunteer, I did not feel it would have been appropriate for me to inquire into it further.

H.

NOTE:  Emma was never in the hospital that year.  Also, I had a long phone conversation with this lady, but I asked her to e-mail me her comments, so I would have them in writing.  I have removed the names of those involved.

***********************************************

Jerri to kphillips (Jackson County Comprehensive High School):

Mrs. Phillips,

Our daughter, Emma Roey, was a student at JCCHS in 2008-2009.   We’ve had some problems with Emma lying, and wanted to check on a story Emma told us that happened at JCCHS.  Emma claimed that one day, she, Christina Romo, and Kayla Gudz were called to the office where an officer and a drug sniffing dog were waiting.  She claimed that the drug dog checked them over, after another child on the bus reported them for selling drugs.  I wondered about this story at the time, but didn’t think much of it until some other problems with Emma came up, and now we are wondering if she made this up because other people have told us that the dogs can only check school property.

Can you just let me know if the dogs check students like that, if this story could be true, and would you have a record of the girls being called to the office?  We just want to verify if this was true or something Emma made up.

Thanks,Jerri

Reply:

Kendra Phillips to me
show details Jun 15 (7 days ago)

The drug dogs are allowed in the parking lot, lockers, and inside classrooms with students out of the class. If administration has reason to believe that a student could possibly have drugs on them, the search is conducted by an administrator and usually the School Resource Officer. If females are involved, I am usually the one that completes the search. During the time your daughter was here, I was never involved in a search with her.

I hope this answers your questions. If not, please feel free to call me.

Kendra

Reply

Jerri Roey to Kendra
show details Jun 16 (6 days ago)

Thank you.  Emma told us quite an elaborate story about being called to the office and being checked by a drug dog after being reported by a child on the bus (The older Bridgeman boy who was in ROTC with her.  I believe his name is Josh.) along with Kayla G. and Christina R.  I believe it was you or the female counselor that she told us was there.

We’ve had a lot of problems with Emma and I’m just trying to check on some things she’s told us in the past, to see if they are true or not.

Thank you,

Jerri Roey

Reply

Kendra Phillips to me
show details Jun 16 (6 days ago)

Not a problem-Please feel free to call or email anytime.

Jerri Roey to Kendra
show details Jun 20 (2 days ago)

Hi Kendra,

I tried to call you, but your mailbox was full, and I couldn’t get a message through.

I wanted to ask you a couple more questions.

Emma’s taken other people’s stories and told them to people, putting herself in stories of things that never happened to her.  I wondered if Emma heard about this happening to someone else and then made the story about herself.  Also,  I was wondering, if there is a record when a child is drug searched?  I would like to know so I can tell Emma’s therapist that if this happened, there would have been a record of it.  Also, Emma said that she, C., and K. were called to the office over the PA system to be checked.  I had wondered if this kind of thing even happened.  Would the school page a child over the PA to come to the office to be searched for drugs?  I didn’t know how the school goes about searching a child for drugs.

Thanks so much for your help.  If you need to call me:

– Show quoted text –

Reply Forward
I checked Emma’s discipline record during the time she was enrolled at JCCHS-there is no record of any behavior issues. We don’t call students over the PA if they are going to be searched. An Assistant principal or the School Resource Officer goes to the classroom to get them. I hope this helps.Kendra

Reply

That does.  Thank you very much.

Jerri

*****************************************************

– Show quoted text –

E-mail exchange between Fr. George Ivey, of Holy Trinity Anglican Church, and his wife Paulette, Ivey, and myself after Paulette told me the story about Emma babysitting and having to call 911 after one of the boys she was babysitting got out of control.  (Not True.)

Dear Jerri,

Paulette is fighting a stomach virus last night and today that she got at school. She wanted me to add that Emma told her that she had called the police to protect her from the priest’s son during the night described. So, I have added it into this edited version of the e-mail to you.

If we can help please let us know.

Fr. George

————————————————–

Dear Jerri,

On December 23, 2010, Emma told me that she had been employed to baby sit for the priest of Mary and Martha Episcopal Church in the Hamilton Mill community. She said that the son of the priest was bi-polar. She said that during the evening the son became so unruly that for her safety she had to lock herself in the bathroom and that she waited there until the parents returned to allow her to come out of the bathroom in a safe situation. It seemed to me that this was a bazar and improbable story. She further told me that she called the police to come to the pastor’s house to protect her. It bears seeking the collaboration of the parents of the boy in question to be certain that she baby sat for them and that this circumstance truly occurred.

Please let me know if you need more information concerning this discussion with Emma.

Sincerely,

Paulette Ivey

Note:  Emma NEVER babysat for the priest at St. Mary and St. Martha

At a women’s group meeting, at the home of A., that I think was sometime in the spring, I heard the story about the priest’s older son, who is bipolar, getting so out of control that the parents had to call 911.  I later told Emma about this incident, so this lie was based on a real event, but Emma was never there when it occurred.

Letter to a former youth leader at Walnut Fork Baptist Church:

July 25, 2011

Dear M.,

A few years ago, my daughter attended a youth group meeting at your church after being invited by your daughter, A.  I don’t know if you will remember, and you might want to check with A., but I wondered if you could answer a couple of questions for me.  At the moment, I am visiting family in CT., and I have tried to call you, but the only number I have was disconnected.

We have had some problems with Emma lying and greatly exaggerating some stories.  Some are harmless, but some have been quite vicious.  I have been collecting some of these stories for Emma’s therapist to see the stories she’s been telling over the years.  Unfortunately, her dad and I didn’t realize what she was doing, and she seems to have a serious problem with lying.

In 9th grade, Emma attended a Wed. night youth group meeting with A.  She went home on the bus with A., and I think your wife dropped them off at the church that night, and you were in charge of the youth group.  Emma came home with quite an elaborate story about you calling on her and her giving her testimony.   I found this a little odd, that a visitor would be singled out like that, but didn’ t think much of it.  Emma went in to great detail when she told me what she said.  Now I’m just wondering if it happened it all.

Another thing Emma said was that you were late for the meeting (car trouble, I think), and that when you came in, you were talking to the kids and mentioned something about your family dog getting run over that day.  Emma made it sound horrible and said that A. and her sister did not know about the dog and were very upset, and Emma thought it was horrible that they found out by you telling the youth group and not telling them directly.  She said that they sat there and cried throughout the meeting, and you just went on talking about how animals don’t have souls.   She tried to make you sound very heartless and cruel for the way you talked about the dog like it was nothing.

Would you either call me or e-mail me to verify if any of these stories are true?

Thank you very much,Jerri

Hi Jerri,

I received your letter today, and wanted to get back to you as quickly as possible concerning Emma and any way that we may be able to help.  I’m thankful to you for taking the time to let me know how anyone (youth or parent) may perceive or have even the slightest concern for any of the content or situations that take place during our ministry time together.

I spoke with A. this afternoon just to confirm that I remember the correct young lady (Emma) and her joining us for a couple of visits at church, especially during the night that you referenced in your letter concerning the death of my dog “Max” almost 3 years ago.  The timing of your letter is beyond coincidence, because I was talking with our neighbor (K.) last week about how helpful he has been during two very sad times when I was not at home.  About eight weeks ago, we had a similar situation with our family dog “Tucker” being hit by a car when my wife, E. and daughter  (9 years old) were outside to feed him.  We have an electronic fence to keep the dogs in the yard when they are free to run while not in the kennel, but that evening he decided to charge right though.  The car which hit either dog did not stop, and Mr. K. was the first person driving by on his way home from work and stopped to help.  Both times our pet had severe internal injuries and did not survive even after taking Tucker to the vet for treatment.

On the evening that Emma describes, E. did drive the kids to church and normally stayed with the youth or helped with the children on Wednesdays.  Mr. K. came to the church around 5:55 pm and told E. and S. (my assistant) what had happened.  He had moved Max from the road before coming to get E. while Miss B. (another neighbor) stayed with Max.  E. called me when I was on my way to the church from work and I met them at the house.  She had ridden with K. back home while S. and K. stayed with the youth.  When I arrived at the house there were three or four cars in our front yard including a Jackson County sheriff who stopped to see why other people were parked along the roadway.  Max died before we were able to get him loaded into my pickup.  K. carried E. back to the church while I drove Max to a friend’s house nearby who has a tractor and an area where we have buried other animals which have passed over the years.  Afterwards, I went to the church around 7:45pm and the students had already finished their lesson for the evening.  A. and L. both remember the discussion that was taking place when I arrived, and someone made the comment that ‘the events of their day resembled a country song’.  I was under the impression that E. had already shared the news with A. and L. when I replied “ … and how sad it is when your dog dies”.  It was not my intention to share the news in that way, but they knew already that something was up when E. had left the church earlier.

I don’t recall making any comments about “animals not having a soul” that evening, but I do believe animals are different from humans in that they do not have a soul which will live for an eternity as humans do.  It is hard to explain when someone asks if they will see their pet in heaven when the bible doesn’t address that issue specifically, but I do know that there will be animals in heaven (In that day the wolf and the lamb will live together; the leopard will lie down with the baby goat. The calf and the yearling will be safe with the lion, and a little child will lead them all. – Isaiah 11:6)

We always strive for an environment where the students feel welcome, comfortable to share and discuss any issues without feeling judged.  Very seldom have students shared a testimony during a regular Wednesday night service, and I cannot remember any guest having ever given a testimony.  This happens more often during a trip to a youth conference, a special weekend event at church or a week long missions trip; and only then after the students know one another very well.

A. mentioned that she has not spoken with Emma since she transferred from Jackson County.  Please know that me and my family are available to help in any way that we can and will keep your family in our prayers.  Our contact information is listed below, and you can call on us at any time.
In Christ’s name,

NOTE:  When Emma told me about this evening, she told me the family was “rednecky” and let their dogs run loose.  She never mentioned the electric fence.  While I knew the mother babysat children in her home, Emma claimed that once the kids got home from school, the mother left to run errands, leaving her daycare children unsupervised.

********************************************

Other lies:

In, I believe Jan. 2011 when Kodi, a Pup and Cat dog was at adoptions, and a man named Dustin (I do not remember the last name) asked to see him, Emma spoke to the man and got Kodi out of the crate for him.  Dustin was interested in adopting Kodi and filled out an application.  When our director found out that he didn’t have a fence, she was hesitant about Kodi going to this home, and Dustin told her that he was told Kodi by the “young lady” that Dustin didn’t need a fence.

 

 

Ursulsa, our director, called Janice Vollmer and asked who said that Kodi didn’t need a fence, and Janice remembered Emma spending a lot of time talking to Dustin, so she called me and said that Ursula was upset about about this.  I asked Emma if she had told Dustin that, and she said no, that she just got Kodi out of the crate, but that “Lily’s mom” was the one who spoke to Dustin.  Both Janice and I saw Emma interviewing the man for quite a long time, and since the three of us volunteering that day were 50+, and Dustin was younger than all of us, I doubt that he would have called any of us a “young lady.”

 

 

When we first started to attend Holy Trinity, a dog that Emma and I knew from the rescue had just been adopted to a woman in a senior community, and after church Emma told me that BR., a woman we met at church, lived in the same neighborhood and had met Denny Mac, the dog.  A few weeks later, as I got to know BR., I asked her about meeting her neighbor’s dog that came from our rescue, and she said she didn’t know anything about a dog.  I later asked Emma if I was mistaken, and she denied saying it at all.

 The church is very small, and I knew I wasn’t mistaken about who she was talking about.

 

*****************************************************

Like the story about Kodi, and the story about Denny Mac, I think Emma just makes things up sometimes to have something to say.  When Emma was a co-teacher for the pre-school Sunday school class at St. M&M, there was a new family to the church.  They had two little girls, and one of them was in Emma’s class.  After church, Emma was telling me about talking to the dad after Sunday school.  She claimed that he was very impressed with her and thought she was in college.  She told me that the mother was actually the step-mother and that the dad had been married before.  Later, as I got to know the family, I found this was not true.  When I asked Emma why she had told me that Mrs. E. was the step-mother, she denied ever saying it.

 

 

I don’t remember what year it was, maybe 2009 or 2008, but it was on my birthday.  A friend, Karen and her mom were going to the Cirque De Soliel and had an extra ticket, so Karen invited Emma to go.  When Emma came home, she said she had a great time, but said something like, “You know how when you go to a movie or something and there’s someone near you that won’t quit talking, that was what Karen and her mom were like.”  She claimed that people around them kept looking at them, giving them dirty looks, etc.   I thought this story was odd at the time, but I wasn’t going to call Karen up and ask her.  I had been thinking about this story a log recently, so I asked Karen about this story, and she said this story was not ture.  She said that it was the Atlanta Symphony Orchestra with Cirque De Soliel, and that if you had been talking, they would ask you to leave.  This can be verified with Karen.

 

I’m not sure why Emma felt the need to make up a story like this to someone who was being so generous to her.  Karen knew Emma for several years while we volunteered almost every Sat. with the rescue.  Karen came to see Emma when she was in the hospital, and we went to Karen’s open house when she bought her home.

*********************************************

 

 

 

 

In early Sept. 2011, I believe, Emma sounded like she was making some friends at school at Jefferson High School, Jefferson, Ga., so Phill and I encouraged her to invite several of the girls out one evening for dinner and to watch a movie or just hang out.  Four girls came out one Fri. night, Bell Blankenship, Jordan Buchanan, and another Jordan, whom I believe was Jordan Blair Hamby, and Bree (I believe her name was Bree Hanson.) We cooked hamburgers, had beans, chips, watermelon, soda, and an ice cream cake for the girls.  My husband and I waited on them, but pretty much stayed in the background and let them visit.

At one point, I took something out to where the girls were sitting on the deck, and one of the girls, Bree thanked me for inviting them.  I told her that we were so glad they could come, and Bree said, “Well, I didn’t have anything better to do.”  The girls laughed, and Bree looked a little sheepish, realizing what she’d said, but laughed too.  I turned to the other girls, laughing, and said, “Ok, so the next time we do this, you all are all invited,” and then pointing at Bree said, “But, she’s not!”  The girls all laughed, even Bree.   No one was upset or angry; no one sulked or went home.  They all knew I was joking. I think I said something to Bree like, “That’s ok. I knew what you meant.”  Later on, when Phill and I met with one of the SEC therapists on Mar. 21, 2011, I told Tamesha (I do no know her last name.) that there were some problems with Emma, for example she had 4 therapists, but no friends at school.  Tamesha told me that Emma said she had invited some friends over once this school year, but I had been mean to them.  I explained that Phill and I waited on them hand and foot, and they all seemed to have a great time.  Phill said he would ask Emma what she was referring to, and she said that I was mean to Bree when I said she wasn’t invited back.  Phill was not out on the deck with us when I was joking with the girls, but he knew we waited hand and foot on those girls, ensuring they all had plenty to eat and a nice time.

*************************************************

Comments and Corrections on Psych Eval

Originally written 4/14/11

Edited 5/13/11, 7/22/11

  1. Emma stated that she had four dissassociative episodes and that all were while riding in the car with me.  Actually, there were six episodes and four of them took place with her dad.  Four of them took place on her way to Jefferson High School, which she hated, and blamed me for the fact that she was going there.  She screamed at me many times that I had given up homeschooling her and it was all my fault.  One episode was with her dad in Suzie McGarvey’s office, and the other was when her dad was driving her to Peachford (Psychiatric) Hospital for a week of daily outpatient care.

Emma had taken AP psychology, and I believe that’s where she learned the symptoms of abuse and learned how to fake catatonia.  One mistake she made was that her seizure episodes lasted way to long, as long as 30  minutes, while in true catatonia, the seizures last only seconds.  Emma was very dramatic in the car, flopping around like a fish. 

  1. Emma told Dr. Born that all the incidents of molestation were in the restroom, but she told Phill and I, along with several others that one incident was in the restroom and the rest were in the sacristy.
  2. Emma told Dr. Born that I “confronted” her about the molestation.  I never confronted her.  She told Phill and I about the molestation on Mar. 21, 2010, Phill’s birthday.    On Emma’s birthday (Dec. 19, 2009), Phill and I went to pick up Emma from her church youth group.  She told us that she’d received a phone call from an on-line friend, whom Emma has never met in person.  Emma said L. had been raped, and had called Emma from the ER, and that this was the incident that stirred up memories of her being molested 4 years before.  When I questioned Emma a few days later, she said that L. had tried to commit suicide because she’d been raped some time before, and that she was afraid to go to the police because this man had threatened to kill her family.  Emma said L. was in therapy, but would not tell who raped her.  Emma also said that L. had been involved in a church program counseling girls who were victims of molestation or sexual abuse because she had been molested as a child.  This young lady never called Emma from the hospital, and my attorney has verified with her father that none of this is true.
  3. Emma stated that the priest moved on to a different church.  This is not true.  He was retired when he took the position at our church and went back into retirement and other activities afterwards.
  4. SEC did not get involved until Jan. 2011, after DFACS was called and was not involved at the time of the molestation.
  5. When I was interviewed by DFACS, I believe two of the dates that Emma said I abused her were dates when Phill was home.  One was Dec. 17, when Phill took Emma to Marietta for an appointment with her GYN.  I was out Christmas shopping for Emma.  I was never alone with Emma the entire day.

The other date was Dec. 19, 2011, her birthday, and Phill was home on that day.  We were both there when she kicked the cabinet in her bathroom, screamed, and then came out and told us what she’d done.  She had sock on, but I asked her to wiggle her toes and she did.  She asked me what they did for broken toes, and I told her they couldn’t put a cast on them.  On Dec. 20th, I asked how her foot was, and she said it still hurt, but was ok.

Also on Emma’s birthday, her Aunt Lee called after she had opened her presents.  Emma told her aunt that she wasn’t doing or getting anything special for her birthday, and that I had taken her shopping for clothes a couple of weeks before, and that was her birthday present.  She also told her aunt that we didn’t even get her a birthday cake.  I did not take Emma shopping for clothes at all, and her big present was a netbook computer which she was very excited about.  She also received several smaller presents.  Emma was angry that Phill did not want to go out to eat on her birthday because he wasn’t feeling well, and he said that he said we’d go out when he got back in town on Friday.  Also, instead of a birthday cake, she had asked that we get her a cheesecake instead, just as she had asked for a cheesecake for the past 3 years for her birthday.  My sister did not tell me until sometime later what Emma had told her.  She thought maybe when she called, Emma hadn’t opened her presents, and that maybe Emma hadn’t known we’d gotten the cheesecake she’d asked for.

  1. Emma claimed that we had a physical altercation on the night of her birthday because she could not get a tv program that we were trying to watch on the computer to come on. There was one night that Emma couldn’t get the show to come on, but it was not on her birthday.  It might have been the Tuesday after her birthday.  She was doing it though a web site, and it didn’t work.  I told her to wait until Daddy got home because he would be able to figure it out.
  1. see note #6
  1. Emma told Dr. Born that I hit her with a pot, but told  DFACS told me that she claimed I hit her with the handle of a pot.  She also claimed I kicked her foot into a corner of a cabinet to cause the injury to her toes, and Emma’s therapist, Suzie McGarvey pointed out that if I had kicked her like she said, she should have had a bruise to the inside of her ankle or foot.
  1. Emma’s grandmother is in a home in Social Circle, Ga.  This past summer was not the first time Emma had seen her.  She saw her twice as a baby.  Emma has photos of herself with her grandmother.  Her grandmother was never interested in spending time with Emma.
  1. Emma claimed to be frightened of her mother for several years, but Phill told me that she became frightened of me after she claimed I started abusing her which said said was when she quit throwing up in December.  We had always been very close.  Emma frequently want to sit, snuggle, and talk “girl talk” and did not want her dad in on our conversations.  Emma frequently told me things and asked me not to tell Phill.  Most of the time, these things were harmless, and I never verified the stories she told me because I thought there was no reason to,but I later found out she’d told me many lies about other kids she knew from school that were not true.
  1. Dr. Born did not talk to me alone.  He only asked me about our family history and Emma’s health history.  He did not verify what Emma had told him, nor did he talk to my husband and I about problems we’ve had with her over the years.  He did not get Emma’s medical history, nor her history from Peachford Hospital.  I specifically put a note in the papers I filled out for Dr. Born, requesting that if he wanted to talk to me, to do so privately because Emma gets angry if I talk about her.  Emma became very angry when she found out Phill and I had gone to talk to her therapist without her.  I explained that we were trying to work on things as parents and needed to talk to Suzie about how to help our family.  Emma accused me of going there to say “horrible” things about her.
  1. Emma went to JCCHS in 9th grade.
  1. Emma was the interim organist, along with another high schooler for about 6 weeks in 2010 at St. Mary and St. Martha’s in Brasleton.  Also, she’s had 3 piano teachers,  not 5, and started taking lessons in kindergarten or first grade, not in preschool.
  1.  Emma became very socially isolated after she told us about the molestation and did not want to do things with other kids, quit the youth group, etc.  Before she told us about the molestation, she was very active in church, the youth group secretary, atteneded church Wednesday nights, in a choir, and a neighborhood bible study group.   Emma may have wanted to leave the church over a boy that she liked who had quit paying attention to her.  Also, her grades in Physics and Spanish, the two classes she hated, were poor when she told us about the molestation.  She spent a lot of time on the computer, chatting with other kids, and not doing her work.  She may have made up the molestation to take the focus off her grades because it was always important to her to make good grades and be known as a smart girl.

In 2009, Emma turned on her dad, telling me he called her a “bitch” and a “slut” every single day.  She told me that she didn’t like her dad, etc.  She was rude and belligerent towards him, and made a point of hugging me and smiling as if she were trying to show she loved me and not him.  She and I had many arguments over the way she treated her dad, and I told her I would not listen to her saying these things that weren’t true.  I tried to discuss with her what a good person her dad was and how he took care of us, supported us so that I could stay home with her, etc.

In  March of 2010, Emma told us she was molested.  She would tell me one thing when Phill wasn’t around, and then tell him another.  She told me she wanted to see the man punished, and the church punished for how they did not handle her complaint, etc., which resulted in us finding an attorney.

In Dec., our attorney had just e-mailed me that he was going to be filing the lawsuit against the church and this man, but I waited to tell him Emma that the suit was to be filed.  A week after I told Emma, she had someone call DFACS on me to claim I was physically abusing her.  I believe she wanted to stop the lawsuit because the molestation never happened.  Now, instead of being a victim of molestation, she could be a victim of child abuse.

Other Stories:

Emma hated public school.  She did enjoy being smarter than most of her classmates, but never seemed to make any friends.  She attended Jackson County Comprehensive High School in 9th grade, and we would have had her finish high school there, but during the 2nd semester, Emma spent a lot of time throwing up, and we pulled her out of school, trying to get her medical (perhaps more psychological?) problems taken care of.  We let Emma do on-line school for 10th grade, but I believe this was a mistake.  Emma became too isolated, and quit outside activities, so for 10th grade, we decided to put her back in public school.  She had made JCCHS sound so horrible with all the stories of drugs and sex, and we had heard that Jefferson City High School was a better school, so we put Emma there, but she hated it just as much, and told numerous stories about her classmates and teachers.  When I would pick her up for school, if it was a nice day, I had the windows down because I would have to sit and wait.  When Emma got in the car, she would slouch down, trying not to be seen, and wouldn’t speak until we got away from the school.  She claimed she didn’t want the “Creepers” to hear her.

Emma greatly exaggerated stories of drug use and pregnancy and JCCHS and Jefferson High School. Just after starting at JCCHS, she told us that her friends in the neighborhood talked about drug parties where kids took whatever they could get from their parents medicine cabinets and threw everything into a bowl and then just grabbed pills and took them. I later realized this was a story she read in Reader’s Digest (which we subscribed to) and when I looked up the article, it was the same month Emma had told me that story. 

Emma attended Jefferson High School, Jefferson Ga. for 11th grade in 2010-2011

From the start of School, Emma hated her English teacher.  Emma complained so much, and always portrayed herself as the victim, so I asked her to write down her complaints.  Because I spoke to the counselor, Heather Thompson, about Emma’s complaints.  She wanted Phill and I to go in and meet with the English teacher.  I did not tell Emma we were going to meet with her teacher, but I think if I had, Emma would not have wanted us to.  This poor teacher had no idea the counselor had called us in, and was shocked and totally off-guard when she was called to the office.  She thought Emma was a great student and really enjoyed having her in her class.  She had no idea there was a problem.  We did not address many of these complaints with the teacher.  We did ask for Emma’s English book to be exchanged for a current one, but I’ll leave it to the reader to guess if Emma even asked Ms. S. for another book or did she not mention it to her teacher, so she could have something to complain about?  Below are Emma’s complaints about her English teacher:

Friday, August 13th

On our idioms quiz today, Ms. S. took 10 points off my grade because I used pencil to write my answers.  I missed the first week of class and this was my first test, so I felt this wasn’t a fair deduction.  I spoke to her after class to ask her if, since I had not been informed of her policies, I might get half-credit back for using the pencil.  She told me I was supposed to copy someone’s notes (which I did on Monday, though they did not mention pencils and pens) and that this was how a regular English classroom worked.  I explained to her that, having spent most of my high school career online, I did not know how a regular English classroom worked.  She replied that she would under no circumstances reconsider the grade, but she would take five additional points off for my “disputing her decision.”

I asked her both at the open house and on the first day for any material I may have missed, and she did not explain her policies or give me any hand outs besides the idioms list and syllabus.

Monday, August 16th

Ms. S. made a point of telling me that another student had dropped her honors class for a class he was “better suited for” and suggested that I might consider the same.  I told her I was just fine in the honors class, thank you.  She also acts like I’m buying time by asking her to repeat questions, despite my pointing out several times that it’s difficult to hear her because she assigned me the seat farthest back and closest to the noisy air conditioning unit.  She asked me if I had “read the material at all” despite the fact that I gave sufficient answers to her questions, once I heard them.

Wednesday, August 18th

Today Ms. S. mentioned the vocabulary quiz on Friday.  I didn’t know what she was talking about, so I asked other students.  They said she gave vocabulary words on the first day of school, and we would be quizzed over those.  I was never given these, although I asked her to give me any hand-outs I missed both at orientation and on my first day of school.  So I had only two days to learn 60 vocabulary words in time to prepare for the quiz.

Friday, August 27th

Our working bibliographies for our term papers were due today.  I brought my bibliography, done in MLA format because that is the format all my English teachers have required me to write papers with.  Ms. S. announced that on Monday, we would be checking each other’s Works Cited sheets according to the guide in our Writer’s Inc. books.  I saw several of my classmates pull out this book, which I had never seen before.  I told Ms. S. that I did not have this book, and she issued me one.  However, I had to re-do my bibliography because she hadn’t told me to do it by the guide in Writer’s Inc.

Monday, August 30th

Today I saw Savannah reading Gone with the Wind and asked what class she was reading it for.  She explained that we were supposed begin reading it at the start of the school year and that we would have a test on September 16th, which is now only two weeks away.  Ms. S. never mentioned this to me.

Also, today I discovered that she issued me the oldest edition of Writer’s Inc., despite having several newer editions available for student use.  It is confusing in class, because the pages she cites are in the new editions and mine are different because the book had not been revised yet.  I also discovered that the book doesn’t address how to cite web sources, because it was printed before web sources became common.  Annsley, who sits in front of me, had the newer edition and it explains how to cite web sources.  When I asked Ms. Schwartz about this, she said that if it had been a problem I should have told her when she issued me the book.  She did not allow me to exchange my book.