Today’s Thought

Posted on January 30, 2015 by losingemma

If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” My daughter Emma Katherine Roey lied about a friend being raped and attempting suicide, claimed to have been molested by a priest, and then, just as her attorneys were about to file a law suit, Emma accused her mother (me) of physically abusing her and poisoning her with DDT. Emma claimed to have a toxicology report to confirm that her mother (me, again!) poisoned her, but would never turn over this report to my attorney. Emma still claims to have health problems because of this “poisoning.” As long as Emma continues with the lies, I will tell her story. Love and thanks to all of you who read and have written to me. If you have any questions or comments, please contact me at: losingemma@gmail.com Please continue to share the blog with others.

Emma, learning about repelling from Phill’s partner, Carl, who, along with his wife Connie, replled into a lot of caves.

If you’ve been following the blog, I’ve been going through Emma’s letters to “Lacey” the friend she claimed was raped and attempted suicide. “Lacey” was the supposed catalyst for Emma’s repressed memories of being molested by a priest when she was 12 years old. Emma told many other lies about “Lacey” and her family.

This past week, I’ve had some interesting conversations with some people who just happened to be put in my path. One couple, whom I’d just met, found out I was divorced and then, without even knowing about Emma, started telling me about the problems they’d had with their daughter when she was a teen. Their daughter is about 10 years older than Emma, and turned out ok, but they had some rough years. Then, the husband said to me that they even had friends who’d gotten divorced because of the problems with their own daughter. Bingo! I was just surprised to be having this conversation, and these people are telling me these things before I’d even told them anything about my situation.

Today I was thinking about how when the church sent a so-called impartial attorney to interview Emma about the molestation. At this point we should have had an attorney, but perhaps I was trusting and naive. (I will write out the whole story on the investigation at some point, but for right now, it’s not a big priority.) This attorney wanted to question Emma without me present. Phill was at work, and that was probably another mistake. I should have had Emma questioned with an attorney present, and the appointment should have been made when Phill and I both could have been there.

Emma was sixteen at the time, and since our deacon (a woman) who’d been very supportive of Emma was there with us, I agreed to let the attorney question Emma without me being present and went outside with our priest (who had also come over) so that the attorney could talk to Emma. It did not go well, and it sounded like the attorney was more than being an objective interviewer, but was rather adversarial. After she was finished, Emma came running out to me, crying, saying she hated the woman. Emma was obviously upset, and everyone quietly left. When I later talked to our deacon, she told me that she did not like the woman attorney either.

Partly, I feel like this woman could not have been objective as she was hired by the church and she was a member of the church. That seems a little bit like conflict of interest, but that’s just my opinion.

What I was thinking about today though, was how after the attorney had left, Emma told me she’d turned on the recorder on her phone and recorded most of the interview. I was proud of Emma for having the presence of mind to do that. Not that anything became of the recording, and I really only listened to a few minutes of it. Emma had her phone under the table, maybe in her pocket, I can’t remember now, and the sound quality wasn’t that great. I find it interesting that Emma accused me of pushing her, shoving her, kicking her foot into the corner of the cabinet, hitting her with the handle of a pot (still haven’t quite figured out that one!) and yet there is no proof of those things. Emma claimed I went into a rage several times and then blocked it out. Phill never saw me do any of those things. There is no proof. I just thought it was interesting that Emma never thought to record these incidents, especially since Emma’s cell phone was practically another appendage of her body. It was either in her pocket or in her hand.

Hmmmmmm… Perhaps if something seems too bizarre to be true………….

I am thankful to have survived all this with my sense of humor intact. Some of Emma’s lies have been downright laughable, and I would just like to ask her what she was thinking when she said them. There’s a cute little song that’s very popular right now and it always makes me smile and think of Emma. I just want to say, “Hey, Emma! Your Lips are Moving.”

I will continue with the next letter to “Lacey” coming up. Sorry for the delay. I have had a busy couple of weeks! Thank you all for support. I will keep writing!

Letters to Lacey Part 3 (UPDATE Completed– 1/18/2015)

Posted on January 14, 2015 by losingemma

*********************COMPLETED JAN. 18, 2014**************

If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” My daughter Emma Katherine Roey lied about a friend being raped and attempting suicide, claimed to have been molested by a priest, and then, just as her attorneys were about to file a law suit, Emma accused her mother (me) of physically abusing her and poisoning her with DDT. Emma claimed to have a toxicology report to confirm that her mother (me, again!) poisoned her, but would never turn over this report to my attorney. Emma still claims to have health problems because of this “poisoning.” As long as Emma continues with the lies, I will tell her story. Love and thanks to all of you who read and have written to me. If you have any questions or comments, please contact me at: losingemma@gmail.com Please continue to share the blog with others.

When Emma was in 6th grade, we went on a bird banding trip to Jekyll Isalnd, Ga.

Emma’s next letter is a 6 page (typed) letter that she wrote over March 24-28, 2009.

March 24, 2009

This letter starts out with Emma saying she’s bored so she thought she’d start a letter to “Lacey.” Emma says the pen-pal thing is good for her, she thinks, and she can copy and paste parts of it to her grandmother who lives in New Jersey. Emma tells “Lacey” about her grandmother has two sons, Phill who’s older, and Andy who is younger, and that Andy was always her favorite, so Andy’s kids are her favorite too despite the fact that they had problems with drugs and one of them made her a great-grandma by having a baby when she was a teenager and then says that this cousin is now pregnant again and still not married. Emma says she is not bitter or anything, although she hated her grandma for a long time in part because her mother resents grandma for neglecting Emma which she can understand. Emma goes on to say that she saw a picture recently of her grandma and felt stupid for resenting a frail looking old lady, so she started writing her and grandma was thrilled. Emma says she doesn’t want to talk to her on the phone and is afraid she hasn’t forgiven her grandmother completely. Emma goes on to say that her grandmother was in Atlanta visiting Andy, and stupid Emma thought her grandmother would want to see her too, but she doesn’t and that really hurts.

Emma goes on to tell Lacey about something silly from her church youth group, a joke they had about “light pollution.” And then she talks about a church retreat where Emma’s friend, Jordan, wanted to do her color guard routine, but didn’t have a flag, so Emma told her there was a mop outside, and Jordan did her color guard routine in front of the whole camp with a mop.

Emma again brings up the prank about burning her hand at the lock-out and calls that her classic-Emma-Kate-moment, and goes on to say she loves being infamous and that she is the secretary and they need her, so they can’t kick her out because she is irreplaceable! Emma adds that in case “Lacey” hasn’t noticed, self-esteem is not one of her many problems, but when she brags, she means it as a joke and not to show off.

Emma tells a cute story about church, and her Sunday school class, and then says she hopes she hasn’t bored “Lacey” with stories about her friends, and then says if “Lacey” is every coming down in our area, she would love to meet her and maybe “Lacey” could come visit for a week or two.

March 25, 2009

Emma starts of this part of the letter saying she hopes “Lacey” isn’t sick of her depressing life and goes on to talk about the neighbor boy who died again. Then she promises that she is done with the depressing stuff now, and tells “Lacey” about a silly dream she had. She mentions watching Beverly Hills Chihuahua, and says she wants to get a Beta fish.

The next paragraph, Emma is excited about having talked to “Lacey” on Elluimnate (part of her on-line school program) and says “You think you won’t get sick of me!” and goes on to say she presumes she is annoying, or at least anyone like Emma would annoy Emma herself, but it is hard to judge herself. She imagines things. She overreacts, unfortunately…

Emma tells “Lacey” about out ladies’ Bible study group and how we were starting The Star, The Cross, and the Cresent, an Andy Stanley program (North Point Community Church northpoint.org), and Emma says that she cannot imagine following the Koran. She wonders why those people don’t embrace Christ’s forgiveness and love, but the Bible says it is not for her to judge, so she supposes she won’t.

March 27, 2009

Emma tells “Lacey” about our Bible study that we attended the night before, and tells her a little about what we listened to on the DVD and how that four thousand year old scripture sounds a lot like modern times, doesn’t it? Then Emma adds that our wonderful new president has a great solution: since they want to kill us, let’s talk to them!

Emma says she doesn’t know how Lacey feels about politics, or if she even cares, but Emma herself is strongly Conservative (and she is not just repeating her parents—-they disagree with her on most issues!) (Though Phill and I were fairly conservative, Phill used to joke that Emma was Right of Right.) Emma does not understand how anyone can follow a leader who wants to condone the murder of an unborn child. Partial-birth abortion especially gets her and she firmly believes they do not have the RIGHT to legalize gay marriage. Marriage was a sacrament way before our government existed and they have NO right to define HER beliefs!

Ok, done with her tirade, Emma says she debated her AP Government class last year (the other 12 students were for legalizing abortion) and you know what’s funny? Emma says that everyone admitted she won. Of course that is because they were only reiterating their parent’s/friends’ dogma, and had no clue why they felt the way they did. She was not trying to sound superior, it’s just true.

Emma talks again about the youth group and how the younger kids think teenagers are these awesome alien creatures and how she loves that the younger kids think she is cool.

Emma goes on to talk about how she is supposed to make something edible to serve after church and how Emma + Cooking = Disaster. She says she is absent minded and tends to mis-measure or altogether exclude certain ingredients. Did she put Cayenne pepper in? She guesses she will do it again to be sure, and how she can ruin even the just-add-water muffin mixes. (This part is pretty much all exaggeration. Emma could cook if she wanted to. She could read and follow directions just fine. Emma really didn’t cook unless it was to make herself an egg or bake something for church. Once she made a jello salad for a Thanksgiving dinner with friends. Emma didn’t really like to cook. The only time I can remember her making a meal was after she went on a mission trip with Eternal Hope of Haiti. She came home and googled a recipe to find something similar to a dish she had there, and she made Phill and I a wonderful baked spaghetti dish. It was very sweet that she wanted to do cook for us, and it was very good! Oh, and Emma would not have cooked ANYTHING with cayenne pepper in it! She did not like spicy food!)

Emma tells “Lacey” that she’s been fighting a bout of depression lately. She was looking through her homeschool program’s yearbooks and counted the signatures. She never did see ten signatures. Emma says she tries to be this happy, exuberant, outgoing person, like the people who are always in the middle of things, the ones whose opinions are like the law…..a magnet to those around them…happy, confident, sure of themselves in their own little worlds. That is who she wants to be, but she is always on the fringes, close enough to watch without being noticed.

Emma hopes “Lacey” doesn’t find her letters horribly depressing. She thinks it helps her to be able to talk to “Lacey”, to know she will listen, and because “Lacey” doesn’t see her every day, “Lacey” doesn’t tell her all the things she should do differently. That was all her friend, Jordan, did was to tell Emma how she should change, and she tried, but she just couldn’t. She is who she is and she can’t change so radically that she is a different person altogether. She guesses she will have to do something differently if she wants her life to be different, but she hadn’t figured out yet what she can do, and that is why it hurts so badly. She wants to be the way Jordan is, and by staying close to her, she thinks she was trying to change herself into part of Jordan, but it didn’t work and now Jordan is gone.

(I have a couple of things to add here. Some of this is just teen angst, but for whatever reason, Emma quit liking the homeschool group where she took classes and I worked part time. She complained about her classes and withdrew from the other kids. She wanted to take Drama, but her biggest complaint was that they always made the plays so that everybody had a part—in other words, she wouldn’t get to be the star. She thought that was stupid. Emma became a sulky teenager and didn’t even try to be friendly. Once she went on facebook, she could post hundreds of comments and “likes.” But when Emma didn’t like something, she could be quite rude. She was not one of the popular kids, and she was unhappy. It probably didn’t help that I had a great time with my kids. I had a lot of fun teaching and worked hard at it. Phill often complained that I spent too much time preparing for class at home for the small salary I received. I always said I was lucky to teach an elective because the kids who were in my class were there because they wanted to be there. I didn’t think Emma and I were in a competition, but she was jealous that I kids who wanted to take my class and who thought I was “cool.” As I mentioned earlier, when I was telling Phill and Emma, over lunch, about my kids one day, Emma had to remind me that those kids don’t like their own mothers either.)

In the next paragraph, on pg. 4, Emma says how grateful she is to have “Lacey” to write to. If “Lacey” doesn’t mind, to please keep Emma in her prayers. Right now she feels like she is just going through the motions, and she really wants to change that. She is putting on an act for everyone around her. Because she is one of those people who likes to make others dependent on her. Her Sunday school class would be empty without here. She is the backbone of the youth group and it would fall apart without her, but what happens when Emma needs to depend on someone? She keeps smiling every day, doing everything she does, and then sh.e cries herself to sleep when nobody’s watching. There is a line in one of the most moving poems she has read, “I smile when I have to / I break down when I don’t/ I know I can be strong/ But I also know I won’t.” That is basically how Emma feels right now. She is tired of being strong, and the things she used to do aren’t working anymore. She turns up her praise music as loud as she can, and sings the words she knows so well and nothing happens. She doesn’t feel the joy she used to. The happiest time in her life right now is the moment before she goes to sleep because no matter how bad or wonderful her day has been, it is over and she can quit. She doesn’t have to act. She just lies there and thinks. The curtain is closed after the final act and she doesn’t have to be anyone she is not anymore. She really wonders if that is her problem; she has practiced being so many different people that she has forgotten to be herself.

Emma thanks Lace for letting her vent, and this is something she could never talk to her parents or her youth group friends about. Her friends look at her health problems and they treat her differently already, so she doesn’t want to give them anymore reason to set her apart. That is the only time she resents her lot in life. It is really embarrassing when she is serving with the other acolytes at church and just slumps over in front of the whole church, just passes out for no reason at all. She hates it, so she has to make an effort to seem normal around her friends. (Another great exaggeration, as Emma frequently vomited, but I think there was only one time she got pretty woozy at the altar. She didn’t actually pass out.)
Emma tells “Lacey” that this song has been running through her head lately:

You would think only so much can go wrong
Calamity only strikes once
And you assume that this one has suffered her share
Life will be kinder from here
Oh, but sometimes the sun stays hidden for years
Sometimes the sky rains night after night
When will it clear?

Natalie Grant, Our Hope Endures

Emma ends this section thanking “Lacey” for listening to her and says please don’t think she is some horribly depressed person. She has just been having a bad week. She thinks one thing she needs to contemplate is that none of us will ever reach our full potential. We all fall short of what God wants us to be, and we can’t expect too much of ourselves. It is good to set high goals, but you can’t give up when you fall short, and basically she wants to be perfect, but it’s not going to happen.

March 28, 2009

Emma continues with her letter to “Lacey” and starts of this section about how she ended up making brownies for church and they even came out pretty. She was so proud. She says she has fun mixing the brownies but the baking most of it and eating the rest while it bakes. Then she gets to cut them and arrange them on a pretty platter except the platter happens to be an heirloom and she would be murdered if she broke it, so that somewhat dampens her fun. When she had the brownies out of the ban and on a cutting board to cut them, her *dad* {sic} decided to stick his *finger* into the batch! So, one brownie has a somewhat smoothed out finger print in the middle of it. SIGH…. (Hmmmm. Where to start? Ok, who takes brownies out of the pan to cut them? We always cut them in the pan, and Emma did too, so I’m not sure where the need for that embellishment came from. And Phill walking by and sticking his finger in the middle of the brownies. Nope. That is not Phill. He wouldn’t deliberately mess up something she was doing. THEN, there’s the whole heirloom thing. Heirloom? Really? Uh…. Not hardly. We had a couple of cheap glass trays that were Phill’s dad’s, and they were special to us because they were his dad’s, but no, they were not heirlooms. I didn’t have any serving platters, so we always used his dads glass pieces when we were taking something somewhere because they were bigger than our dinner plates. But, Emma can sure dish out a good story, can’t she? “Heirloom” sounds so much more interesting than dime store dish!)

On the bright side, Emma continues, she is not nearly as depressed as she was yesterday. She looked up her new medication (don’t ask why she didn’t do that before) and depression is indeed a common side effect. As are mood swings. And suicidal impulse. Soooo, that explains a bit of this. She is glad she is not just randomly sinking into states of general self hatred. Emma says she may stop taking her medication if it makes her like this though. She was seriously upset yesterday. (Note: I don’t remember which medication Emma was on at the time, but I don’t remember the side effects depression or suicidal impulse. The one problem she had with the medication she was on was that it caused increased sun sensitivity, and Emma would break out of she was out in the bright sun too much. It wasn’t a big deal. When she was younger, with her throwing up episodes, she’d been on medication, such as Elavil. During the whole, “I was molested by a priest.” thing, Emma was on Celexa and Lexapro at some point. I don’t remember which one it was she tried first, but then told her psychiatrist that she was depressed and having suicidal thoughts, so the psychiatrist switched her. Emma would always look up the side effects of her medications and then claim to have those side effects.)

Emma says it has been raining all day and sometimes she likes the rain, but she didn’t today because it made her sad. She kept thinking about God crying…. But, as she said, she was not nearly as bad as she was yesterday. Emma talks about her cousin who lives Co. and has two children……

Emma talks about how she picks her own family members like here mom’s friend Sandi (Sandra Brooks Mccravy) who wants to be her mom and has a dysfunctional extended family. She says that Sandi goes to family gatherings and then afterwards, wonders why she bothered.

Albert, the greeter at Costco (Buford, Ga.) is her uncle. A lot of people at Costco know Emma’s dad because they see him in his UPS uniform, and they know about Emma’s health problems, so they are nice to us. She says we see Albert the most and he always asks about her, so he gets to be her uncle. (I didn’t even know Emma called this man her uncle, and I think she only did this in her letter to Lacey, but he was a very nice man. I think that is in the job description. He was nice to everyone.)

Emma goes on to talk about one of the volunteers from the dog/cat rescue and tells “Lacey” how we do Thanksgivings and Christmases and other holidays with our rescue friends. (This part was true. Emma did call three of our friends from the rescue, “Aunt.”)

Emma says she really wonders what “Lacey” thinks of her. Does she think she is insane yet? As she’s said, she really is, but “Lacey” may or may not be convinced of that. (At this point, I’m sure “Lacey” probably thought Emma was just another teen, but I do have to wonder what she thought after she found out Emma was telling people that “Lacey” was raped and attempted suicide!)

March 30, 2009

Emma starts off with a couple of cute, silly stories about her the kids in Sunday school. (Maybe true, maybe not.)
Emma then writes about how Jordan is still not speaking to her and she is annoyed at Rob for treating her like an invalid. Emma talks about carrying a child and she was going to carry one of the crosses, when Rob took it upon himself to carry the cross because everyone is afriad she is going to pass out. (Another exaggeration. Emma wasn’t quite the frail little waif she makes herself out to be in her letters to”Lacey.”)
More musings about how there is going to be a donkey in the service for Palm Sunday, that she has to follow in since she will be crucifer. Whe is afraid the donkey will have an accident and she will ruin her shoes.
Emma says she’d better sign off before this letter goes over the postal weight limit—–she is not supposed to do that, and she did it last week, so she’d better not do it twice in a row……She is so blessed to have double-sided printing. (Really? The last letter was shorter than this one. Also, we had a scale so we could check if mail went over the 1 oz. limit. We also had plenty of extra stamps, but Emma had better not go over the postal weight limit? Really?)

Love and Blessings, Emma-Kate

More letters coming up…………

Letters to “Lacey” Part 2 (updated 1/13–see note at bottom)

Posted on January 11, 2015 by losingemma

Emma, on the way to a Blessing of the Animals service at our church. Emma Roey, Emma Katherine Roey, Emma Kate Roey

May 19, 2009
Emma begins this letter with “Hey Lacey!” in a cute font and then switches to something more readable. She starts out saying what a day it was because we went to her friend’s funeral. (The young man Emma calls a friend whom she probably said hello to maybe twice in 10 years.) Then she goes on to talk about (names changed) seeing a boy she babysat for named Jason with another boy she babysat, Gage. She goes up to them and asks Jason if he is having fun. Jason tells her that Gage doesn’t understand that everyone is sad because Ollie (name changed for young man who died) didn’t wake up, and she hugged Jason and they both cried. Great story, only it probably didn’t happen as Emma was glued to my side the whole time we were at the home after the funeral AND Emma NEVER babysat Jason.

Emma goes on to say that that was nothing compared to the next day when she happened to be babysitting Jason (7 yrs) and his brother Conner (5 yrs) the following day. She said she got there at 9am and Cooner wasn’t awake yet so she went in to check on him at 10am and could tell he wasn’t asleep, so she said, “Come on, Conner! Breakfast time!” Conner didn’t open his eyes and told her he wasn’t getting up. When he said it, he called her, “Miss Em.” Emma told him that yes he was and they would go to the lake after breakfast. Conner tells her that he was going to sleep until he woke up with Ollie.

Emma tells “Lacey” how she totally lost it and picked up and held Conner in his arms and cried. Then she saw Jason standing in the doorway, and he came over and sat on the bed, putting his arm around Emma, saying “It’s ok, Miss Em. He didn’t mean it. Miss Em? It’s ok.” Emma says they must have been quite a sight. (Great story! Sadness, tears, the cute kid thing! Only thing is that I have a documented statement from Jason and Conner’s mom that Emma NEVER babysat for them! Also, another point to bring up would be that at the funeral or at Ollie’s home (I don’t remember which) a neighbor, who had several children that Ollie played with, told a similar story about his little boy waking up and asking about Ollie, and he went on to tell about the conversation he had with his son about Ollie’s death. Emma creatively stole this story and turned it into her own about Jason and Conner.)

Then Emma tells Lacey how she’s done with the depressing stuff now. She talks about the youth group lock-out at the church and how much fun she had. She goes on about her friend Jordan’s cousin Olivia who Emma says she hit it off with right away. She tells some silly stories about the lock-out (maybe true, maybe not, maybe greatly exaggerated) and then goes on about how Olivia’s uncle killed himself the November before, and how Emma and Olivia stayed up talking about very late talking about her uncles suicide for three hours. (I never looked into whether or not this story was true or not. I still have Jordan’s mother’s phone number, so I could call and verify, but I don’t care enough to bother. I’m just going to bet this was another one of Emma’s creations.)

Emma goes on to talk about her friend Jordan throwing herself at rob and looking like an idiot, and how Jordan was mad at her. Then Emma has a pity party about how she and Jordan used to be close but weren’t anymore, and Jordan was the only girlfriend she had and knowing she lost her hurt. What’s kind of funny here is that Emma adds, “And I’ve never had a close relationship with my mom.” I know this was said out of teen angst and for drama, and now it’s just kind of funny as well as sad. Emma and I did almost everything together. Even at the age of 16 we would read a book together (usually I was the one who read aloud), she snuggled up to me to watch tv and usually wanted me to put my arm around her or she would hold my hand. I taught her my hobby (beadwork) and we worked on projects together. Emma talked to me about everything from books to current events to the boys she liked. She frequently told her dad we were having “girl time” if she was talking to me and he walked in the room, and she made him leave the room. Up until she was 16 years old, Emma frequently slept in my bed when her dad was on the road. She only quit because she complained that I got up to early in the morning and it disturbed her when I let the dogs out, took a shower, etc. The women in our bible study group were shocked by Emma’s actions. Frequently at our group, Emma wanted to sit by me and snuggled up against me. Ask any homeschooling mom, and they will tell you that to get out for a couple of hours among other adults, as a mom, the last person you want to sit with or talk to after being with them all day every day, is your kid. I was happy to get to visit with others, but Emma was usually right there with me even then, or as a friend in the group so bluntly put it, “She was always up your ass!!” (I love you. You know who you are.) Nope! Emma and I never had a close relationship.
Then Emma states that she’s sort of depressed, not as in suicidal, just unhappy and adds a great big “*SIGH.*” (Maybe one of the side effects of DDT poisoning is depression?)

Emma gets back on the topic of what fun she had at the youth group lock out and how she played a trick on Ms. Karen, the youth group leader, when she pretended to burn her hand in the fire. (Cute story, and yes, she actually did this, but may have exaggerated some of the details.)

Next Emma goes into how she was looking through the bible and found that the universal call to worship, Psalm 117 is the shortest Psalm and the longest one is 176 verses, and says ok, she finds strange ways to occupy her time.

Next Emma talks about how very honored she was after church when Elizabeth, a little girl from the Sunday school class Emma assisted with wanted to sit with her during coffee hour, and how after church, Elizabeth’s mom cam running out to our van and said Elizabeth wouldn’t stop crying because she hadn’t hugged “Miss Em” goodbye. (Actually, Phill, Emma and I were walking out to the van at the same time Elizabeth’s family was leaving and Elizabeth did want to hug any goodbye, but there was no crying. This story sort of happened, but not quite the way Emma wrote it. Emma goes on to say how Elizabeth just loves her and would come home with her, and how Elizabeth adores Emma, whom she sees for two hours a week, but misbehaves for her parents, so see why she doesn’t want kids? (Kind of like Emma?)

Emma tells a few more cute stories about school, the neighborhood, and shares a quote she likes, “Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.”
Emma also mentions how she’s been singing Praise you in This Storm (Casting Crowns) and types out the lyric in a curly-que font just in case “Lacey” hasn’t heard it:

I was sure by now
God, You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say “Amen” and it’s still raining
So I will praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I cry
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm….

Blessings and love from Emma-Kate

Note: If you are a regular reader to this blog, you have already noticed, but since I seem to be picking up new folks who maybe haven’t had time to go through the whole thing, I will mention it here. Above, I wrote about Emma taking the story of the neighbor and his little boy after Ollie’s funeral and turning it into a story about herself. This seems to be a theme with Emma and you will see it over and over again in the blog. One prime example is when Emma claimed to have babysat and had to call 911 and lock herself in the bathroom because one of the children, who happens to be bipolar, was so out of control. Emma HEARD the story about the parents having to call 911 on their bipolar son because he was out of control. This did happen, but not to Emma.
I don’t know if there is a name for this kind of behavior. It is useful for writing fiction, but not in real life, and not when you make innocent people your victims. I wonder if Dr Richard Born (Applied Psychological Health, Athens, Ga. http://www.appliedpsychhealth.com ), Genie Burnett (Manna Treatment, Duluth, Ga. http://www.mannatreatment.com ) or Suzie McGarvey (North Gwinnett Counseling Associates http://www.ngcounselingassociates.com , formerly with Lanier Counseling http://www.laniercounseling.com ) or maybe even Emma’s therapists at the Social Empowerment Center http://www.socialempowermentcenter.com Rachelle Hutchinson, Emily Kirby, Candace Whitman, Lori McCarthy or even Emma’s DEFACS caseworker Alicia Yearwood and Maria Wyatt (I will have to double check that last name, but I believe that was it.) could shed some light on this for us. A girl can’t have too many therapists.

Letters to Lacey Part 1

Posted on January 9, 2015 by losingemma

If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” My daughter Emma Katherine Roey lied about a friend being raped and attempting suicide, claimed to have been molested by a priest, and then, just as her attorneys were about to file a law suit, Emma accused her mother (me) of physically abusing her and poisoning her with DDT. Emma claimed to have a toxicology report to confirm that her mother (me, again!) poisoned her, but would never turn over this report to my attorney. Emma still claims to have health problems because of this “poisoning.” As long as Emma continues with the lies, I will tell her story. Love and thanks to all of you who read and have written to me. If you have any questions or comments, please contact me at: losingemma@gmail.com Please continue to share the blog with others

If you’ve been reading along, you will know that in 9th grade, we quit homeschooling and put Emma in public school, more specifically, Jackson County Comprehensive High School in Jefferson, Ga. With the exception of Drama under teacher Bonnie Roberts, Emma hated public school almost as much as she hated homeschooling under that micromanaging, control-freak teacher (me again!) she had. I couldn’t win. Emma no longer called me a control-freak on a daily basis, but now she accused me of giving up on her. I didn’t stick to homeschooling. It was all my fault that she was so miserable. I’m the one that quit homeschooling her. (I guess her behavior had nothing to do with the REASON I quit homeschooling.)

The 2nd semester of 9th grade started in Jan. 2009, and Emma began having a lot of vomiting issues. (I will write more about Emma’s vomiting at some point in the blog.) Emma hated school, had no friends at school, and hated riding the bus with all the degenerates. She claimed everyone she knew at school smoked or drank or had sex. There was no one she wanted to be friends with. The more Emma complained about school, the more her vomiting increased, and she missed so much school she was in danger of having to repeat the 9th grade. It was then that Phill and I pulled her out of school and let her finish the 9th grade on line.

Phill was the computer person in the family. He had always been interested in them and read and studied them. He built computers for people, repaired computers, and managed web sites for a few people. I, on the other hand, was barely functional on a computer. I did not understand what Emma did to get on line, how she did her classes, etc., so I let Phill handle it. If Emma needed help, I couldn’t help her anyway.

Sometime during that semester online, Emma got paired up with someone in her online English class for a pen-pal assignment. Emma was paired with a young lady from Dalton, Ga., who, for the sake of privacy, I call “Lacey.” I don’t know the details of the assignment. I think they were supposed to write letters to each other, and somehow report this to their teacher. Emma and “Lacey” started out writing letter, then e-mail, and then texting. Several months after becoming pen-pals, on Emma’s birthday of that year, Emma claimed that “Lacey” called her from the ER after having been raped and attempting suicide. If you’ve read my previous posts, you’ve seen that there were many other lies Emma told about “Lacey” and her family. Since I have some of the letters Emma e-mailed to Lacey, I will share them here. I can’t print the letters without Emma’s permission because of those pesky copyright laws, so I will paraphrase and tell you what is in them. If you would like to read the letters for yourself, just e-mail me at: losingemma@gmail.com and I will be happy to provide you with the copies I have.

Emma spent a lot of time writing very long letters to “Lacey.” Her letters were almost more like a diary. We will start with the first one I have:

March 17, 2009

Emma’s letters usually started with a “Hey, “Lacey!”

In this letter she starts out saying that she had a pretty sad day. She says she just found out a friend and neighbor took his on life. (Actually, this young man was not a friend. Emma had probably said nothing more than hello to him in the approximate 10 years he had lived down the street from us.) She talks a little bit about the family and mentioned that the mother was in our bible study group. (This wasn’t exactly accurate either. The mother visited our group a few times, but did not come regularly.)

Emma moves on to “brighter topics” and writes about how she has this idea for a music-based curriculum, written by Emma herself, on finding God in popular culture. (Emma never wrote music.) She talks about how the problem would be teaching kids who would be a year younger than she was, but she knew if they gave her a chance, she could give them an awesome year. She was going to talk to our priest and write up a sample lesson for his perusal sometime the following month. She hoped he would agree and let her write the curriculum. Emma states she wants to do the first topic on “Legacy” (Nicole Nordeman) and quotes the chorus:

I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to you enough?
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy

(Ok, so what was really going on in our lives at this time? Emma was an assistant Sunday School teacher to an adult every Sunday. She loved the preschool kids, and they loved her, but her main job seemed to be taking the kids to the bathroom and assisting the teacher. Funny how Phill and I never heard about Emma’s plans for writing a curriculum.)

Emma goes on to talk about another big project she had, a young man A. with neurological problems whom we were trying to get involved in the youth group at church to help him feel included with the other kids. It wasn’t Emma’s personal project. There were several people trying to encourage A. to join the group.

Then Emma goes on to describe her friends from youth group: Jordan, Rob, Rob’s little sister, Molly, Evan, Nick, and our Deacon’s granddaughter, T. who Emma said was in love with Evan and wanted to marry him. Emma writes that Rob asked her out in 6th grade, and that Molly planned on Emma and Rob getting married. (If I remember right, Rob told Emma he liked her when they were in 6th grade, in the choir room, and she didn’t speak to him again for about a year and a half.)

Emma writes cute stories about helping with the Lock-in and keeping up with the younger kids. Cute stories about playing “Bloody Mary” in the bathroom with the kids and such and how the kids wanted Emma to tell them stories about HER life! (Really? I’m not quite buying it, having spent time with those same kids.) Emma ends that section saying how she will NEVER be the “in-charge” person of the lock-in again. (Ummmm, Emma wasn’t in charge. There was an adult there who was in charge. No one in their right mind would leave a 9th grader in charge of a lock-in.)

Then Emma tells “Lacey” about her family, that her dad drives a tractor trailer for UPS and how he got baptized two years ago and how that is HUGE for her and she about tears up when he takes communion because he didn’t for so long. She mentions that her mom doesn’t work and that her parents are really old compared to most peoples’. (Thanks for that, Emma!) She talks about the pets and that we foster dogs for the rescue and how she keeps her fingernails painted year round in exotic colors, and her toes match in spring and summer, but she doesn’t bother in winter.

Emma goes on to write how she spent August through Februrary in Jackson County Comprehensive High School (JCCHS) and it was hell on earth with drinking, drugs, prescription abuse, and pregnancy all rampant at that school She claimed it had the highest teen pregnancy rate in the country. (I wonder where she got her statistics?) Emma claims she couldn’t let her guard down for a moment and that the girls on her bus openly bought and used illegal substances literally right under her nose. (According to the girls Emma rode the bus with, they never saw anyone buying or selling drugs on the bus.) Emma talks about how she cried herself to sleep more often than not, and how she went from a sweet, naive Christian girl to a raw, exposed, helpless teenager in situations beyond her control. It was the darkest thing she every experienced, and she couldn’t even tell her parents what she saw and felt at that school!

Next comes a cute story about Emma and her friend Jordan at a church retreat. (Maybe true, maybe not.)

Emma ends the letter with talking about one of her favorite lines from “100 Fun Things to do at Walmart” and signs the letter, “Love and Blessings,”

To Be Continued…………..

Losing Emma

Monthly Archives: January 2015

Letters to Lacey Part 1