The Rewards of Being a Victim

If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” Both of these posts give a brief description of what happened. As Emma’s mom, I am blogging my experiences with Emma and the things she did/does. This is a child who made up a story about rape, accused a priest of molesting her, and then as her attorney was about to file a lawsuit against the priest and the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse to stop the lawsuit because she knew her lies were about to be discovered. Emma claims to have the TOXICOLOGY REPORT to prove that her mother poisoned her with DDT and that she had to move to get away from her mother. (My attorney has been waiting for months for over a year for that that toxicology report.) Emma was recently living with her boyfriend’s family in Ohio, but came back to Ga. when the boyfriend began to have doubts about Emma and broke off their relationship. As long as my daughter is accusing me of child abuse and attempted murder, I will continue to tell her story.

The Rewards of Being a Victim

Before Phill took out the Temporary Protective Order, to have me removed from my home, we had to come up with places for Emma to stay. After all, she wanted to go live in a group home. My thought was that she needed to live in a group home and to see what it’s like for kids who didn’t have it as good as she did. Let her meet kids who really were abused or who came from bad situations. Emma’s life would look like the life of a princess compared to some of these kids. She had two parents who loved her and she was allowed to do almost anything she wanted (within reason). She never lacked for food, clothes, or a warm bed. Of course once, when Emma and I got into an argument over something she wanted (I can’t remember what it was now.) and she didn’t get her way, she got angry and screamed at me, “YOU HAD ME! YOU OWE ME!” At the time, I thought it was a pretty ugly thing to say, but we all say things we don’t mean in anger. Emma said a lot of ugly things over the years, but for some reason, this one stuck with me probably more than any other. It sort of haunted me, and it still does. I’m sad to say that I really felt like this was in insight into Emma’s world. Emma felt like we owed her.

When Emma stayed with friends and neighbors, she got treated like a beloved guest with dinners, plays, clothes, trips to the beauty shop, etc. After all, who wouldn’t want to do something nice for a poor abused child who was beaten and poisoned by her mother? Emma made out like a bandit. I will share about some of the people Emma stayed with, and how Emma took advantage. I’m sure I only know a few of the rewards Emma collected. There’s probably a lot more that I don’t know.

From what Phill told me, Emma mostly stayed with our neighbors, John and Judy Hall, but she also stayed with some other neighbors, Randall and Cora Andrews, and one of Phill’s RC plane buddies and his wife, Mike and Wendy Timms who lived not far from us in Hoschton, but now live in Dacula, Ga. Since Emma didn’t want to see me, I didn’t always know where she was. Phill just told me what he wanted to.

John and Judy Hall probably have the most interesting story of all the people Emma stayed with. Everything I am sharing here is what Phill told me, so I don’t know what is true and what is not. I didn’t really know the Halls well, only talking to them occasionally if we ran into them when we were out taking a walk. One day, Judy herself did tell me some things about her grandchildren and her ex-son-in-law, but everything else I heard from Phill.

Phill met the Halls when our neighbors recommended him to help them with their computer. Those of you that know Phill know what a computer geek his is, and he is very talented at building, working on, and pretty much anything to do with computers. It used to be his main interest until he got back into RC planes. The Hall’s daughter, Jina, was married to a race car driver named Buckshot Jones and going through a divorce. Phill ended up doing a lot of computer work for the Halls and much of it had to do with Jina’s divorce. Several times he told me he had to “wipe out” their hard drive in case they were subpoenaed during the divorce. I never asked what kind of things they were trying to hide, but there must have been something they thought would be incriminating on their computer.  The Halls appreciated that Phill would drop everything and go work on their computer whenever they called and they paid him well.  Phill joked that the Halls knew how to treat him when he came over.  If it was in the morning, they fixed him a cup of coffee when he walked in, and if it was after noon or later, they always handed him a beer when he walked in.

For a while, Jina and the boys lived with John and Judy, and they had some sort of strange arrangement where she got the boys from 6am to 6pm, and then their dad got the boys from 6pm to 6am. It sounded really odd to me that their dad would only have the boys for a couple of hours before they went to bed every night, and then have to get them up so early to give them back to their mom? It was really the strangest custody agreement I’d ever heard of. The boys were little then, and it made no sense to me to be putting them through that.
Phill said that Buckshot Jones came from a very wealthy Gwinnett County family, and his grandfather was a judge or something high up in the Gwinnett County government. He told me that Jina received $10,000 a month in temporary support from her husband. I remember Phill and I talking about it, and we were both kind of astounded that someone could receive that much money, but I have no doubt some race car drivers do really well.

Over the course of the divorce, there were a lot of ugly things that Phill would come home and tell me. Jina moved out and bought a home, but then the home was foreclosed on when Buckshot didn’t pay the support he owed, so Jina couldn’t pay her mortgage.

Jina had a beautiful giant schnauzer that the couple fought over, and Buckshot eventually won custody of the dog. Phill said as soon as he got the dog, he got rid of it, and Jina and the boys were heartbroken. Judy and John had two miniature schnauzers, and they bought the boys a Jack Rusell because one day they said that was what they wanted. If you know anything about Jack Russells, they are not a breed for everybody, and from what Phill told me later, the Halls regretted getting the dog because after a couple of days, the boys were no longer interested in it, and they were stuck with it.

Phill told me at one point, Jina had a video tape of something incriminating about Buckshot, but some friends of hers stole it. I could not imagine friends doing this, and when I asked about it, Phill said that the Halls believed the friends were paid off by Buckshot’s family to steal the video.

Judy and John were not allowed to discipline their grandchildren because if it got back to Buckshot, he would not let the Halls have visits with the boys. Phil told me the boys behaved horribly and called John and Judy all sorts of horrible names. At one point, he said one of the boys stole Judy’s cell phone to give it to their dad who was trying to get some information from it. He also said they Judy complained that Buckshot sat in bed and watched porn on his computer with the boys present.

At one point, Phill told me that the Halls were thinking of selling their house because of all the money they’d spent on their daughter’s legal bills.

Much later, I think well after the divorce was final, Emma and I were walking our dogs around the block. We were in front of the Hall’s home, when Judy pulled up and got out of her car to check the mailbox. We spoke for a few minutes, and she asked about how Emma was doing, school, etc. I may have asked how her grandsons were doing in school, and I think at that point the older one was in 2nd grade and the younger one was in kindergarten. Judy got to talking about her grandsons and I could tell it made her very sad. She told me that their dad wouldn’t get out of bed to get them to school, so they had missed twenty-something days of school already and were likely to be held back a grade. Phill had told me that Jina volunteered at the school, so she could be around her kids and try to help them, but often she’d be there and the boys were not. It was all very sad.

Judy worked part time for salon in Brasleton, and the one time I got to see Emma, sitting in the van, she’d had her hair done. Since about 9th grade, Emma frequently used a straight iron on her hair, and it was very straight, cut in layers and looked very pretty. Phill told me that Emma had wanted to get her hair cut, but I wouldn’t let her. Well, as you can see from this photo, that’s not true.

Emma and Johnathan McCravy at a taping of the Sean Hannity Show.

Emma and Johnathan McCravy at a taping of the Sean Hannity Show.

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Judy was a petite lady, but because of some health problems, she put on some weight, and she gave Emma a bunch of clothes. Emma always was a clothes horse, so from what Phill told me, she was thrilled about that.

At first, the Hall’s were driving Emma to school, and I think Phill was paying them to at least cover gas money. Emma had a permit, but Phill did not want Emma to get her driver’s license until she was 18. Funny thing was, once he got rid of his wife, he let Emma go ahead and get her license so she could drive herself. From what some of the neighbors told me, she then totaled two cars and she may have gotten a ticket in New Jersey. She had failed the test for her permit the first time, so I’ve often wondered how she did on her driver’s test. With her dad being a truck driver, you’d think she would have had plenty of lessons, but I missed this milestone in my daughter’s life, so I really don’t know how she did on the driving test.

When John and Judy went out of town, Emma stayed with our neighbors, Cora and Randall Andrews who lived behind us, and across the street from Judy and John Hall. Randall worked with Phill at UPS and was the union steward until he fell on the job and if I remember right, damaged both rotator cuffs. Randall was a hard worker, and when he wasn’t at UPS, he did tractor work on the side. After winning a settlement with UPS, Randall became a truck driving instructor. Since his wife was a teacher, he liked to joke that they were both teachers. Cora stayed home with the kids when they were little and then went back to teaching P.E. and also went back to school to get her Ph.D. in P.E. She then became a coach at Jackson County Commprehensive High School.

Phill was a big help to Cora when she was working on her Ph.D. He helped her with computer work, and Cora even thanked him in her dissertation. Phill got a kick out of that she mentioned him, but didn’t even mention her husband in her acknowledgement.

Randall and Cora had two boys who Emma played with when she was little, but once the kids started school, they didn’t see much of each other. When the kids were little, we helped each other out, occasionally watching each other’s kids. Phill and I even kept the boys when Randall had a heart attack and was in the hospital.

When Emma started high school at Jackson County Comprehensive High School, she never had anything nice to say about her former playmates. She claimed they always looked high or looked to be on something at school. Knowing how involved the boys were in school, and how involved their parents were, I didn’t believe this for a minute. I’m sure they boys weren’t perfect angels, but they both were very involved in sports and other school activities. Since Emma claimed she often saw them looking this way in the morning when she went to school, I suspected they might have been sleepy because it was early in the morning and with sports and homework, they were probably short on sleep. Emma went on and on about them and I remember at one point she tried to convince me that the younger son had a reputation for partying and using drugs. Both of these boys went on to college, and the younger son turned down an appointment to West Point to go to UGA and even got some scholarship money.

Emma also talked about Cora (Dr. Andrews) when she went to JCCHS. Emma had a coach named Coach Beaver for P.E. and Freshman Focus class. Coach Beaver, according to Emma, also moonlighted as a cop in Statham, Ga., and would tell the kids about all the drug problems in Statham.

According to Emma, Coach Beaver and Dr. Andrews had some sort of rivalray. Emma claimed that one time, in P.E. class, Dr. Andrews walked through the gym and told Emma to put some nets or something away when they were done. She said when they finished, she started putting the nets away and Coach Beaver yelled at Emma and asked her what she was doing. When she stated that Dr. Andrews had asked her to put the nets away, Emma said Coach Beaver told her to leave the nets where they were and if Dr. Andrews wanted the nets put away, she could do it herself. Did this really happen? I never asked neither Cora, nor Coach Beaver, but I’m guessing probably not, just like I’m guessing that Coach Beaver didn’t moonlight as a policeman.

Since I’m on the topic of Coach Beaver, I will mention a couple of other funny things Emma said about Coach Beaver. She claimed that Coach Beaver and her political science teacher (I can’t remember his name.) lived across the street from each other. This was during the 2008 election. Emma claimed that Coach Beaver was a conservative and her political science teacher was a liberal, so they both tried to out-do each other with signs in their yards for their particular candidate. Hmmm. I wonder what the odds are of these two teachers living across from each other and being political rivals ?

While staying with the Andrews, Emma went got to go see a play at her old high school under her favorite teacher, Bonnie Roberts, who was the drama teacher. (I will have another whole essay to write about Emma’s experience being in Drama at JCCHS, including confirmation from Ms. Roberts as to some of the lies Emma told about Drama.)

Emma also stayed at the home of Mike and Wendy Timms, one of Phill’s RC plane buddies. I might have met Mike at an RC event, but I’m not sure. Mike and Wendy have to daughter a few years younger than Emma, and one of them shares Emma’s name. They also had the fact that the girls were home schooled in common. I know the Timms family often went to the week-long RC event, SEFF, down in Americus, Ga. because Phill and Emma both talked about them being there.

Emma spent a weekend at the Timms’ home when they still lived in Hoschton. With the Timms family, Emma went out to eat Mexican food, and went to see a play that her latest crush, Johnathan McCravy, happened to have a role in. I think she also went to church that Sunday with the family. If I remember right, they went out for Mexican after church.

After I was removed from my home, Emma also spent some time with her friend Kayla Benifield Weaver, at the home of Kayla’s mom and stepdad, Sheree and Jeff Barwise, not far from home. Anytime Emma went to Kayla’s they ate out a lot because Emma claimed that Sheree didn’t cook, and I have a cute picture of a group of them going bowling.

This victim thing really paid off for Emma. She was treated like a guest everywhere she went (No chores!) and there were so many wonderful fringe benefits like meals out, plays, clothes, shopping, etc. It’s tough being a victim.

Temporary Protective Order, Last Page!

 If you are new to this blog, you may want to read the posts “In a Nutshell” or go to July 2012 and read “Sending out a Letter.” Both of these posts give a brief description of what happened. As Emma’s mom, I am blogging my experiences with Emma and the things she did/does. This is a child who made up a story about rape, accused a priest of molesting her, and then as her attorney was about to file a lawsuit against the priest and the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse to stop the lawsuit because she knew her lies were about to be discovered. Emma claims to have the TOXICOLOGY REPORT to prove that her mother poisoned her with DDT and that she had to move to get away from her mother. (My attorney has been waiting for months for over a year for that that toxicology report.) Emma was recently living with her boyfriend’s family in Ohio, but came back to Ga. when the boyfriend began to have doubts about Emma and broke off their relationship. As long as my daughter is accusing me of child abuse and attempted murder, I will continue to tell her story.Please contact me if you have any questions. e-mail: losingemma@gmail.com

Emma and Kayla Benified Weaver when Kayla's grandparents (the grandfather Emma claimed was a racist as well as a Nazi Sympathizer) took the girls to Medieval Times.

Emma and Kayla Benified Weaver when Kayla’s grandparents (the grandfather Emma claimed was a Nazi Sympathizer) took the girls to Medieval Times.

This is the last page of the Temporary Protective Order. I don’t really know how things are done, but since the notary, Karen M. Stroly, appears to be a paralegal for the office of Phill’s attorney, I’m assuming you document the TPO with a notary and then take it to the court house to file. Karen M. Stroly notarized the TPO on April 5th, a Tuesday, when I was still in North Carolina, and then Phill took it to the courthouse on April 7th when he told me he was taking Emma to the home of our friends Ann and Jack Verner in Chamblee, Ga., about 50 or so minutes away from our home in Hoschton.

Sort of a side note, I had asked Phill to pick me up a couple of pairs of jeans when he went to Costco or Sams, because he stopped at those stores at least once a week. I’d loss some weight from the stress of the whole situation, and my jeans were too big. Phill brought home 4 pairs of jeans, and I tried them all on. Usually, in a case like this, I’d pick what I like, or something wouldn’t fit, and I’d keep what I wanted. Well, all the jeans fit very well, but I felt like I only needed a couple of pairs, so I put two pair on the dining room table and told Phill he could return them when he went back. He kept telling me to keep them, but I felt like when things calmed down, I’d probably put the weight back on, so it seemed silly to me. I guess since Phill was planning on throwing me out of my home, the least he could do was buy me some jeans. (But I left the two pairs there when I left my home.)

TPOL

I do want to write more about the TPO and about how Phill showed up WITH Emma when I was volunteering and asked another volunteer to send me out to talk to them. I have to admit, when I found out about the all the lies that Emma told about “Lacey” and how she wasn’t raped and had never attempted suicide, and how her mother was never dying of breast cancer, and how Emma never called 911 on a boy she never babysat, and how the girl down the street was not pregnant and did not have an abortion, and how she was never drug searched at her school, etc., etc., etc., I thought Phill would realize that there was a problem with Emma, and apologize to me and we would move on as a family and get Emma the help she needs. I was wrong.

There is another thing I want to mention, for some of you that may be new to the blog. (I have noticed quite an increase in readers according to my stats, and I have received a few private messages from readers.) I have offered to take down the blog and keep this whole matter between Emma, her dad, and myself. Emma chose to ignore my offer, and that’s fine. I will keep writing. I just want my darling daughter to know that if she is going to accuse me of child abuse and attempted murder, she’d better be willing to go to the mat on it. As long is Emma is lying about her mother, her mother is going to be writing about what really happened.

Coming up next, “The Rewards of Being a Victim.” I will share with you some stories about the people Emma took advantage of and stayed with because she couldn’t stay home with her abusive mother (even when her dad was there). Some of them have stories as interesting as my own. Then I want to share the story of Emma and her first boyfriend (whom she called her fiance) and I want to share with you the e-mails Emma wrote to “Lacey” as they are long and quite detailed and give quit an insight into Emma’s personality. Goodness, so much writing to do, and not enough time on my hands!

Thank you all for the love and support.

Temporaroy Protective Order Page 10

(If you are new to this blog, my daughter, Emma Roey, at the age of 16 made up a story about a friend being raped, claimed that this rape brought up memories of a priest molesting her when she was 12 years old, and then when her attorneys were about to file a lawsuit against the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse. Emma later claimed her mother had poisoned her with DDT. At this point in the blog, I am documenting the Temporary Protective Order my husband took out to have me removed from our home. If you want to read more about Emma’s story, go to the archives. A good place to start is with “Sending out a Letter” in July of 2012.)

On this page, Phill checks the box that he wants me to attend a batterers intervention program, but I wonder why he didn’t want me to attend a poisoners intervention program. After all, Emma claimed I was poisoning her with DDT! I think Emma was watching WAY too much Criminal Minds. (Still a great show although I don’t catch it often anymore.)
TPOk

Temporary Protective Order, Page 9

(If you are new to this blog, my daughter, Emma Roey, at the age of 16 made up a story about a friend being raped, claimed that this rape brought up memories of a priest molesting her when she was 12 years old, and then when her attorneys were about to file a lawsuit against the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse. Emma later claimed her mother had poisoned her with DDT. At this point in the blog, I am documenting the Temporary Protective Order my husband took out to have me removed from our home. If you want to read more about Emma’s story, go to the archives. A good place to start is with “Sending out a Letter” in July of 2012.)

This page states that I am to stay away from Phill and Emma, my home, Emma’s school, Phill’s job at UPS in Doraville, Ga, etc. I am also not allowed to sell or dispose of any property, which is kind of funny because how would I? I was pretty much allowed to pack a suitcase and take one of our dogs. Any attorney will tell you that if you can get your spouse out of the house, you definitely have the advantage in the divorce.

I had to turn over my keys to the sheriff’s deputies, who were actually very kind and recommended I get an attorney ASAP. They knew a lot more about this kind of thing than I did. Turning over my keys was not enough for Phill though, and he had a locksmith come out almost immediately to change the locks.

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Temporaroy Protective Order Page 8

(If you are new to this blog, my daughter, Emma Roey, at the age of 16 made up a story about a friend being raped, claimed that this rape brought up memories of a priest molesting her when she was 12 years old, and then when her attorneys were about to file a lawsuit against the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse. Emma later claimed her mother had poisoned her with DDT. At this point in the blog, I am documenting the Temporary Protective Order my husband took out to have me removed from our home. If you want to read more about Emma’s story, go to the archives. A good place to start is with “Sending out a Letter” in July of 2012.)

Not much to add to this page, just saying that Phill get’s custody of the minor child, Emma Katherine Roey.

TPOh 004

Three more pages to go! I’ll get back to it soon!

Temporary Protective Order Page 7

This page is even more interesting! If you read the first paragraph, Emma went catatonic! Omigoodness. She could sit stone still, and unfortunately, we were all babying her, and let her pull off this little charade, because we were afraid for Emma’s mental health (as well we should have been, but for different reasons). I have some video of Emma’s little “catatonic” fits that I will post at some point.

So, Emma went a little psycho, went to Charter Mental Hospital in the Dunwoody area of Atlanta, Ga. This was pretty much a waste of time, and nothing really seemed to be done for Emma other than locking her up with a bunch of other teens that had problems. Later on, when we took Emma to other therapists, none of them were able to get her records from Peachford. I have heard other complaints about this mental hospital, and I know one person who gave me a detailed account of their family’s history with Peachford.

An interesting side story here is that when Emma got home, she claimed that there was a girl there who had attempted suicide because her boyfriend had been the first murder of the year. At this point, I vaguely remember, and I’d have to research the story, maybe check the ajc (Atlanta Journal Constitution) archives, but it was somewhere outside of Atlanta, and I think it started with a “C” (Clayton? Cumming?) It was some sort of New Year’s Festivities, and the story was in the news, so I’ve always wondered if this young woman was actually at Peachford, or was this another one of Emma’s fabrications because she heard the story on the news. Funny how this young woman, who’s boyfriend was in the news ended up at the same mental hospital as Emma and even on the same ward, isn’t it?

So, back to the TPO, according to Emma, I was committing acts of violence towards her 1-2 times a week and bless her heart, she was afrid I would kill her if she was alone with me. Poor Baby. How scary.

Temporaroy Protective Order Page 6

(If you are new to this blog, my daughter, Emma Roey, at the age of 16 made up a story about a friend being raped, claimed that this rape brought up memories of a priest molesting her when she was 12 years old, and then when her attorneys were about to file a lawsuit against the church, Emma accused her mother of physical abuse. Emma later claimed her mother had poisoned her with DDT. At this point in the blog, I am documenting the Temporary Protective Order my husband took out to have me removed from our home. If you want to read more about Emma’s story, go to the archives. A good place to start is with “Sending out a Letter” in July of 2012.)

This is where it gets interesting. Pages 6 and 7. So, around December of 2010, Emma claims I abused began abusing her. Funny timing here. This was around the EXACT SAME TIME that Emma found out her attorneys were about to file a law suit against the priest, the church, and the diocese! Omigoodness! What is a girl to do? She knew her attorneys would need to question “Lacey,” the friend that Emma claimed was raped. She had to stop all of this. She couldn’t go to her parents and admit she’d made the whole thing up! After all, she’d been carrying on with her molestation story for almost a year now! There were so many people involved and so many people knew about it. Even as a child, you could catch Emma red-handed, with her hand in the cookie jar, doing something she wasn’t supposed to be doing, and she would deny, deny, deny, until she realized you were not going to accept her story, and then she usually got mad at her parents for catching her, rather than acting guilty or ashamed because she was doing something she wasn’t supposed to be doing.

What better way to stop the lawsuit and yet remain a victim than to accuse your own mother of physical abuse? Oh, this poor child! She was both sexually molested and physically abused by her mother? The horrors!

I do get a little tongue in cheek sometimes, and with some time and distance, some of Emma’s actions are almost comical, but overall, I am very sad for my daughter. This is a child who doesn’t care who she hurts with her lies. I know Emma will probably never have a “normal” life. I know she needs help, and I’m not even sure a decent professional would be able to help her. I don’t know enough about psychology/psychiatry to know if Emma can be helped. I’m just a mother who knows something is very wrong with her daughter.

So, down at the bottom of the page, you can see where Emma accused me of grabbing, shaking, and pushing her into fixed objects. Yeah, right.
TPOh

Temprorary Protective Order Page 5

This page explains I can be charged with stalking if I violate the TPO. No worries there, although Phill did show up where I volunteer WITH Emma in the van, and asked one of our volunteers to tell me to come out to the van. (Uh, no thanks.) I will share more about that story later at a later date. I have the written statement from the volunteer, and I may have a copy of the police report I had to file in order to protect myself in case Phill tried to change the story.

I’ve removed some of my personal information for the Respondent Identifying Fact Sheet. You know I’m not going to share my weight with anybody! I also find it amusing that Phill was married to me for almost 27 years and put my height down as 5′ 10″ when I am just over 5’7″, but then again, he always claimed to be 6 ft tall, when I think he is just a couple inches taller than I am.
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Temporary Protective Order Page 4

This page mentions that Phill gets to keep the mini van, which was the car he usually drove, and in fact was the car he was in when the TPO was served, so I could not have taken it anyway. I’m not sure what Phill was thinking by putting this in the TPO. I would have just taken my car anyway, but maybe he was trying to stop me from taking too much out of the house. The sheriff’s deputies pretty much let me pack a suit case and that was about it, so it’s not like I could have cleaned out the house. Or, Phill might have thought I would have taken the van for spite and he wouldn’t be able to haul all his RC planes around. His big RC event, SEFF (South Eastern Electric Flight Festival) was just a week or so away, so he really had to have the van to transport all his planes to Americus, Ga. for his week long trip. Believe me, as shocked as I was by what was happening, Phill’s SEFF trip would not have even entered my mind.

TPO$ 001